Are you afraid that someone else will see you a day and reveal that you're not really as fantastic and skilled as they think? Read and get tips on what you can do to get rid of the feeling.
Why are so many of us afraid to be revealed as untrue, despite the fact that we actually do excellent? Impostor Syndrome is a term that covers it to feel insufficient. And in fact, it is up to 70 percent of us who walk around with the feeling of being soon revealed as untrue. But where does it come from?
It is a combination of your personality, your intelligence and your self-esteem, as well as the experience you have with you through life. If in your childhood you were not recognized to be exactly the person you are on good and evil, but instead constantly being judged by your achievements, you have learned that you must perform to be recognized. It leads to low self-esteem. You can easily be good at something without feeling worth something. Low self-esteem is the main reason for developing the syndrome.
Did you know...
Fraud syndrome is widespread among the well-begotten (top 10%) and highly gifted (top 2%)?
How low self-esteem is a common phenomenon in many people, people who develop the fraud syndrome are typically successful. It is precisely what the syndrome is created by: There is a discrepancy between their inner sense of failure and inadequacy, and the outer signs that they are actually doing well. Performance anxiety and perfectionism are also typical of people with the syndrome.
The growth in the childhood family is of major importance for the development of the syndrome. If you have not been good at supporting each other in the family, you as a child, can not build a realistic self-image because the positive feedback is limited. You do not learn to navigate in life yourself, but learn to live for someone else's rules and standards when you have grown up in a family with many conflicts and rules on how to behave. You become lonely with a sense of inferiority when it has not been legitimate to share and treat insecurity and anxiety with the other family members and you have not been able to speak openly about their feelings.
Exhausting lifestyle
When you never know when what you do is good enough, you constantly try to do better. Even though you have been very concerned, and others praise one, you still think you could have done better. Therefore, praise others' praise. No matter how much effort you make, it will never be good enough. You feel like a fraudster, have a chronic fear of detection and are convinced that you can not survive the success. You do not make things easy, but for the recognition of others. It's the fear of not being good enough, driving a forward.
It is exhausting always to perform to avoid detection and very lonely because others do not know how to do it. The very high demands that you put on yourself can therefore lead to stress and burnout. There is also an increased risk of developing abuse a. Food, games, alcohol or sugar. You can also go to work partner. When one feels that one stands out for something that is not, it can eventually also develop into depression or anxiety.
A good self-esteem begins with ourselves. We must dare challenge our own self-image. So it's about being curious about yourself. It is important to find out from which one has perceived that one should always perform to be worth something in the eyes of others. Then check if your parents and teachers have made you believe that intelligence is a quality that you will always demonstrate. And start looking at how you speak to yourself. What does your inner critic say? Where does it come from?
If you can answer yes to the following questions, you probably suffer from Impostor Syndrome:
• Are you committed to proving that you are proficient in receiving someone else's recognition?
• Are you expecting negative feedback as soon as you have solved a task?
• Is it hard for you to ask for help because you are afraid others will find that there is something you can not?
• Are you always afraid that you are going to disappoint others?
• Does it hurt you to make mistakes?
• Do you quickly forget the things that are successful for you, or attribute your successes to coincidences or anything else that is not yours?
• Preller others praise because you have an experience that you can do better?
• Do you only tend to compare yourself with the most skilled and envy them?