THE EPISTLE OF JAMES ABIONA TO THE WIDOWS, MATURED SINGLES, SINGLE MOTHERS AND DIVORCED. Part 4.
I said last night on my 5th point never should you marry someone who feels he knows more than you always trying to fix you. He will never respect your opinion nor welcome your little advice. But he loves to lecture you.
Even if such man is many years older than you. Two is better than one. For him to stoop to you and ask for your hand in marriage, it means God is making you his better half. So if he feels he knows it all and you know nothing, its the biggest error if you follow such man. He will not give you your due respect.
You are not a baby factory. Neither are you a sex toy. You are a precious daughter of Zion, needed to be loved, cared for and above all; whose voice should be heard. Therefore, never marry Mr Too-know who believes your brain is empty.
NOW LET'S GO INTO ANOTHER FIVE GUYS YOU SHOULD NOT MARRY.
1: NEVER MARRY A MAN OF AN OPPOSITE FAITH WITH INTENTION TO CONVERT HIM:
This is another serious pitfall that have crashed a lot of homes. Never marry someone who does not share your Faith. A man who has a different believe is fixed. Never try to be a super woman who want to change man.
You have a lot to deal with for a lifetime in your own lifetime. First remove the log in your own eye, then you can come and remove the speck is another man's eye. You can't change anyone. Don't go there.
2: NEVER MARRY SOMEONE ASKING YOU FOR SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE.
95% of men are guilty of this. If you give in, you are laying a weak foundation for your marriage. If you take your stand on this and the guy agrees, fine; you can marry him. That's a gentle man who respect you enough. Every man wants a show before marriage, but a lady that helps the man not to fall into this trap should be praised. The man that agrees to this condition should be praised the more.
Truth be told, its not easy. Someone like me who used to be ladies' man before Christ escaped narrowly because my wife was living with my pastor and also she was a Virgin. I was a pastor in training but yet my testosterone was not born again.
So I prayed a simple prayer. I said when there is chance to do it oh Lord, give me no time and when there is time give me to chance. God answered me. We were extremely busy with church activities till we got married.
But run from any man who insist you must bow to this pressure before he marries you. Remember those who made this demand in the past and you concurred still left after the show. Therefore, close your legs permanently for now. We men only respect ladies that respect themselves.
3: NEVER MARRY WHO HAVE BEATEN YOU:
This set of guys have huge problems with self esteem. Don't try them please. Once beaten twice shy. Once beaten; many times more. I have been married 19 years, I have never raised my hands against my wife. She has done more than enough that deserves maximum beating but God forbid.
The day a man beats you, i beg you in God's name to kill that love and run for your life. Bad enough, these guys who beats there wife will see soldiers or team of SPECIAL ANTI ROBBERY SQUAD (SARS) at check points and behave themselves. But returns home to beat up a lady, Kai!!!
4: NEVER MARRY A MAN WITHOUT STAYING POWER:
Never marry a guy that can not withstand pressure. These type of men always run away when trouble comes. Put them to test and see his reaction.
I love what a lady did sometimes ago. Five guys wanted her and she put all of them to test saying she had a terminal sickness. All the five guys left. Then her real guy showed up. She threw him the same yet he stood his ground. That's the kind of guy with staying power. We call such men the last man standing.
5: NEVER MARRY A SELF MADE MAN WHO ONLY WANT A COOK AND BABY FACTORY:
There are many ladies in a large and beautiful prison yards today with solid cars and gadgets. You can't afford to compromise your joy and happiness. A guy who has made his money who needs a partner in progress is a good guy. But a guy who have made his money who needs a housekeeper, housewife and baby factory is not good.
I will tell you how to attract the right man tomorrow.
Enjoy your day.