INTRODUCTION
Building up a relationship is not a day job, because it’s a process, a relationship may involve two different people or parties depending on the types of relationship one want. It could be friendship relationship. It also depends on the types of relationship.
TYPES OF RELATIONSHIP
- Friendly relationship
- Business relationship
- Dating/marriage relationship
- Contract relationship
FRIENDLY RELATIONSHIP
This is a kind of relationship that is meant for friendship without any intimacy, it is what we usually call innocent friendship, it is common with children, adolescent and adult . It is a relationship that does not involves sex.
BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP
This is a kind of relationship that involve a group of people with common interest and goal, this set of people pull their resources together to achieve a common goal, they are people with common interest, they form a relationship in other to achieve this goals.
CONTRACT RELATIONSHIP
This is a kind of relationship that is build by a contractors, it is different from business relationship, it involves a chain of contract like a group of contractors who come together to harness their resources for a common goal.
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DATING/MARRIAGE
Dating is a relationship which involve two opposite sex, who are matured to involve in a relationship, it a way of creating means of understanding one another, it is a true dating that the two partners try to define their relationship whether it could lead to marriage or not because most youth who are into dating may think that it will lead to marriage.
Dating is an avenue to know your spouse, through dating some hidden characters of the partners can be expose, because most partners cannot hide all their character, every individual have their wick point, so dating help to curb some menace before marriage.
It is very important to know your spouse before marriage, because marriage is an everlasting covenant that should not be broken. But it is unfortunately that the society experience high rate of divorce beginning from the 1940s, the Nigerian Newspaper recorded high rate of divorce especially in Kano State, in which 60% of the women have divorce their husband and most of them are single mothers not because their husband are dead but because of improper plan before marriage.
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The causes of broken marriage are as follows;
• Lack of proper plan
• Health problems
• Child problems
• Sex satisfaction
• Dirtiness/cleanness
• Diseases
• Infidelity
• Family pressures
With this above listed are causes of divorce, I will like to explain each of them and how they contribute to divorce.
LACK OF PROPER PLAN
Most couple don’t think proper of finances and how to be industrious before going into marriage with empty hand with the believe that life is a bed of roses. But the reverse is the case, when the person did not get what he want this can lead to break up in marriage.
HEALTH PROBLEM
This is common in spouse who do not check mate themselves in terms of blood group and genotype and this easily cause divorce when individual or couples are not compatible e.g (AS Marry SS) which is not proper, this can lead to divorce in marriage in other to avoid sickle cell children.
SEX SATISFACTION
Some couple hardly gets satisfaction from each other; this is because some person is weak sexually why some are active. If the two parties are not compatible they will be force to cheat on each other and this can lead to divorce.
DIRTINESS
Some couple may not be compatible when discovered that his spouse is dirty, very unkept and lack personal hygiene they find it difficult to cope with each other and this can cause divorce.
DISEASE
One of the major trends to marriage and relationship is the issue of diseases especially the sexually transmitted diseases like HIV Aids and the rest. e.g If one person is effected with this virus called Aids couples will be forced to break up their vows in other for them not to contact the disease.
INFIDELITY:
This is one of the greatest barriers to marriage, because infidelity in marriage can constitute to other problems like, contacting of sexually transmitted disease (STD) this is one of the most significant in the barriers of marriage, infidelity can leads to having a child without knowing his biological father or having children out of marriage. Infidelity in marriage has contributed massively to broken homes causing scandals in marriages as a result of infidelity.
CHILD PROBLEMS/BARRENNESS:
Barrenness is caused by many factors, but some couples refuse to adhere that they have a problems, barrenness could be cause by a man or a man fault or women fault but most people believes that barrenness is caused by women especially in Nigerians.
Child is a gift from God, no one is barren before the Lord, God who made very one to be fruitful and have time for everybody.
He gives according to his wish. But despite this, people still divorce as a result of barrenness without checking their problems medically, some men have low spar count, while some women have problems with their ovum and some don’t even menstruate talk more to conceive. All this contribute massively to barrenness and sometime family pressures constituted to it.
HOW TO KEEP A PROPER RELATIONSHIP AND TO AVOID DIVORCE
• Love
• Forgiveness
• Hardworking
• Sincerity and understanding
• Total submission to one another
CONCLUSION
Relationship is a step by step process; it is not a day job. It is not what once can do or practice within 24 hours, it is necessary to define your relationship, It is good for one to know whether the relationship is base on marriage, or contract or sex as an ideal relationship should be well define.
In the aspect of marriage, relationship should be able to defined the relationship and know what you want. When you know what you want then you can get the kind of relationship you want.
So know your spouse!!!