It can be frustrating to go through many similar relationships over and over again and find yourself right back where you started.
What types have you been attracting?
Do you find yourself perpetually attracted to the kind of person who doesn’t give you the time of day, who isn’t there when YOU are the one in need, someone who distances themselves from you the moment you show your interest for something more?
Yeah, we’ve all been there.
We have all wondered about the perfect person out there, the one who will make us believe that there’s an end to pointless dating, and that we actually are worthy of finding our soulmate.
That person is you.
It’s not a mystery why you haven’t been able to break this cycle. There are culprits in your life that make you susceptible to this kind of attraction.
So how do you break the cycle?
Here are some things you need to realize:
Treat yourself better:
You are your own measure of happiness, of success, of your worth.
Your relationships are a reflection of who you are. If you keep attracting the kinds of people who turn out to be the wrong ones, it means you’re also not the right kind of person yet.
Pay attention to your own needs, wants, your own person.
Evaluate, honestly, what it is you have to offer, what you need to improve on, what are your strengths, weaknesses, what’s important to you, what your goals are, etc.
You need to build a good working relationship with yourself before you can build it outside yourself with others.
Peace with the past:
It doesn’t just concern your past romantic relationships that didn’t work out.
Making peace with your past is all inclusive– your family relations, your friends, your teachers in school, that bully, and everyone that has affected you.
It’s normal to compare your current romantic situation to your last ex or the one before that or the one before that. But sometimes we forget that other people have affected us before and in between those times.
Maybe it was something your dad said to you back when you were young that made you believe you’re not good enough, maybe it’s your mom telling you you need to change so many things about yourself to be liked, maybe it’s that bully telling you you’re a nobody.
There are a lot of things that affect our thoughts and feelings on important matters such as our values on family, on money, on friendships, and most importantly about ourselves.
When people have a low self-esteem, chances are, they look to other people for validation and that’s not permanent or controllable.
By leaving the ball on the other court, you’re never in charge of it.
Get control back. Take charge of your life by learning from the past and moving on. Don’t relinquish your power to anyone or anything else.
Believe in the perfect one for you:
Half the battle is knowing you can win.
If you believe that the person is out there for you, that the one is more than just a possibility, then that will make you more equipped to find the right person.
It’s hard to condition yourself to believe in something that continues to elude you.
To believe in a love that you haven’t experienced, and more than that, to be proven over and over again that you haven’t found it yet.
But to not believe that it’s out there for you to find is much worse than getting hurt because you have faith that it does.
Your faith in love send the message out to the universe, it creates a good energy out there for you, and that energy is what will help manifest the reality you want to create.
So keep hoping, keep believing, and keep yourself open to the possibility.
Credit to: Author Heather Mathews