When I lived in China, people would ask me whether I am religious. Here, in Uzbekistan, people just presume I am a Russian Orthodox. The thing is, I am actually an Atheist. Or Spiritualist? I have no idea what to call that, and whether that label is really necessary.
I can't say "I believe in Evolution Theory", because science is not something people are supposed to believe in. Scientific facts are true(until, of course, the fact is disproved, but then there is another fact), and it really does not matter whether you believe in it or not.
But then there are dark areas or currently unexplainable things. There are theories of how these unexplainable things work, but there is no way to prove it. At least yet.
However, there are still a few things I believe in. I believe there is something like karma. I believe there is some way for thoughts to materialize. Or maybe it is just all coincidental. Either way, I am living my life in a socially accepted way: I don't steal, I don't kill, I don't fuck around behind my wife's back and so on.
Actual picture of karma Cool looking lamp
The point is: me, believing in one god or another, or the same god with a different name does not automatically make me or anyone else a bad person. And here's a fun fact: I used to be quite radically fucking religious person at one point of my life. Taking fun to the next level, let me just say I used to be a huge hypocrite and asshole because of that(or maybe it was due to my nature? lol). So again, while believing in whatever does not automatically make you a bad person, I kind of used to be way less tolerable and adequate during my glorious Orthodoxy days, lol.
The interesting part is how I came to it:
Back in the 90s and early 2000s, Russian society was just starting to form. Suddenly, forbidden and even dangerous topic of religion has become part of the national culture. And of course, when suddenly you are allowed to do something, you pump it into a new, hypertrophied form. As of now, denying the very existence of god is punishable by law in Russia. Just try googling "russia pokemon go church".
So here is how it happened to me. My grandma used to have the posters of Jesus and icons all over her place. Somehow, I got to some reading and by the age of 10 I'd seriously pray to god so that the teacher would give me a good mark when I wasn't quite certain of my own ability to earn it. It'd go further and further until my baptizing when I was 16, a few weeks before I left for China.
Me, being the shy introvert I am, did not hang out much in my first years in China, hence I had a lack of communication. That was further influenced by my limited ability to speak English; and well somehow I just couldn't mix with the Chinese. As the time passed, I felt like I really needed to be a part of something, something bigger than myself, whether a community, a movement, a religion or whatever. One thing led to another, and somehow I became increasingly patriotic and religious. I guess, a few months after, came a massive cognitive dissonance.
Imagine this:
On one hand I love my country, on the other I have troubles tolerating Russian government. Then I see the church playing dirty games, and being more and more involved in politics. For a person with a fraction of human brain that would be an issue; I am lucky to have an brain in its entirety, so of course that has ultimately led to a rejection of both national religious ties. I believe, part of that rejection has come from the fact that by the time I was 20, I had a very diverse group of friends, literally from every corner of the world; I started consuming most of the information online and from the books and magazines in English, and yes, it is often different from what you might hear or read in Russian. I have also got involved with a foreign woman, who was way too wise for me. And thank god(lol) she was patient enough with me, so now we are married.
Ultimately, now I am free of any kind of pride that has to do with my(or anyone else's really) nationality and heritage. We do not choose where to be born, just as we have done ZERO input into our heritage(because we INHERIT it, duuuh), so the very concept of patriotic pride and happiness based on a fact of being born whomever is bizarre. Same has happened to my religious views.
Now, the funny part is I still have an instinct of a sort to pray when I am hoping for something to happen and that something in no way depends on me. And I have to say, it is quite disarming to catch yourself on a thought that I do not believe there is anything superior that could help me on demand.
I guess, looking for some kind of higher power is an instinct of ours, just like it is for some animals to seek shelter or playing dead. Ultimately, it is about protection from a third force, independent from ourselves.