I exhale. And with my breath, so goes my spear. Long and graceful. It cuts the air and swiftly pierces an outer ring close to the target. After a night in the budding forest of Albany, Ohio, serenaded by an orchestra of cicadas, I find myself playing with an atlatl. Mamerto Lagitan, whom I only met a day prior, is helping me remember how to play. His words guide the cells and energy that lived when the atlatl was used for survival. A game for me today, was a weapon used by indigenous groups to hunt food and defend their livelihood in battle. This weapon, unexpectedly found its way in my hands, and it felt as if it were home. With each exhale, I let it move beyond my fingertips, a feeling that felt so familiar, like the tingling sensation when awaking from a deep sleep.
I found Mamerto Lagitan, a descendant from the Ifugao tribe, humble father, artist, craftsman of the trees, eighth generation shaman, and keeper of sacred spaces on my journey waking up and remembering my indigenous self. I was born in the naïve bubble of the San Fernando Valley in California and raised by Filipino parents who successfully assimilated to the American dream. Not speaking in their native tongue to their children and enforcing a regular application of whitening cream to their darkest child (me), there was a clear allegiance to the American way growing up that was common in most Filipino families. America was right and anything connected to traditions prior to colonial influence were perceived as “uncivilized” and “backwards”. At the age of 30, I committed to search for an understanding of practices beyond the veil of the American savior narrative, beyond the policies, beyond the collusion with corporations that were enslaving its people- in prisons, detention centers, underpaying jobs, debt, violence, repression, fear, war. I was hungry to understand my Filipino lineage and in search for spaces that were not masterminded by the corporate state, but were in their natural form, that were self-sustaining, where the soil was rich, and the seeds could grow, so there Mamerto was.
I found myself playing the atlatl in Mamerto’s front yard, a portion of his 14 acre land that holds sacred purpose. In the front yard, sits an unfinished indigenous hut, waiting to be resurrected. Mamerto had a dream to build this transportable Ifugao hut. This hut honors Filipino tribes who were made to be objects on display during St. Louis’ World Fair of 1904. This fair celebrated America’s dominance over indigenous people, over their traditions, and over their land. In 1904, it was America’s 100th year since the signing of the Louisiana Purchase and they used patriotism to distort stories of America’s massacres of indigenous cultures. Entire villages were built to imitate those of the Visayans, Bagobos, Samals, Igorots, Tingguianes, Negritos and 30 other tribes. America showcased what they sought to invade, capture, vanquish, and subdue, displaying indigenous cultures as “uncivilized”. Today, Mamerto resists America’s system that “civilizes” nations through domination by building the Ifugao hut and honoring people that knew how to take care of its people and the environment. He is resurrecting the past for an awakened future and hopes to heal the land and people that have suffered from imperial displacement and oppression. Once completed, the hut will travel across America and be on display, unlocking truths of cultures that were connected to the healing abundance of this world.
The captivity of indigenous people as a human zoo at the World’s Fair is just one moment in history that speaks to America’s crimes against humanity. America’s expansion comes from the annihilation of indigenous peoples. The plutocracy’s preferred choice of acquiring wealth comes at the cost of natural resources and the livelihood of its people. The deeper the divide between generations and the power the earth holds, the easier it is for us to be dominated and subdued, relying on the plutocrats to be our savior from other countries, from ourselves. We see a militarized state growing every day. While we are fighting for land, water, clean air, we are also fighting for our true selves to exist. This current “civilized” world has relied on systems that disconnect us from having a relationship with the land that brings us life. Mamerto is resurrecting the Ifugao hut so that we can find guidance in indigenous ways back to ourselves. During my stay in the budding forest, I was given eyes that remembered and saw the land for what it was intended for, that which nourishes our mind, body, and spirit. Like Mamerto, we all have the power to reclaim what was lost and share these truths. I know that my atlatl is imprinted within, activating the cells that knew how to be in union with mother earth. This is an invitation for all of us to remember our roots and create spaces in resistance to authoritative domination, but frees us, elevating our mind, body, and spirit to its highest vibration in honor to the earth and one another.