It’s taken me two months to figure it out, but I have finally created a post that is “worthy” of the trending page. That being said, it is missing the essential ingredient to make it there.
THE ALL POWERFUL PAID UPVOTE
Let’s see how well it does without it.
You know, for science…
For best results read this with Russian accent in mind.
I Go Walk
Greetings my Steemit friends who also I calls Steemians,
Today I was deciding in mine mind what to do. I thinks, "hey why not go find most beautiful specimen and take photo shoot?
So so grabbing Nikon P900 I go walk,
Yay, most happy good time. I find chicken and birdy. Nice but not most beautiful specimen.
So I go walk more.
Oh very nice, small bird joining on me walk, but not treasure I be seeking. I settle only for most beautiful specimen.
Walking on in my quest to find perfection.
Stupid ugly swan, not even sure why me would take photo. But deny much loved Steemians the experience of walk? Never.
Discussed by agrogant swan, me decided to change path.
Almost giving hope up of finding me photo shoot. In the grass I spot something.
A little closer looking.
Yes, this one is dead, but if I look around a little more, just maybe, lucky day I will have.
Oh yes, this is what I seek.
Such beauty. So stunning.
Another angle really brings her colors.
Looks like me not only fan of "Perfect Specimen."
Well I hope you enjoy me journey as much as I enjoy bringing it to your likings. :)
Do not forget to vote up and resteem me.
And follow also.
And vote me witness.
Also I except steem and steem $ in transfers for unnamed charity ;^) Just put "For Charity" in transfer memo.
I will totally look at your post man for only 1 Steem, for 2 Steem 50% upvote, for 5 Steem 100% upvote, for 10 Steem I wills resteem and 100% upvote, for 20 Steem I will stand at street and hold sing with yours post url, For 50 steem I will Spam whale of yours choosing with your post 300 times for one day.
(introduceyourself)(walkwithme)(introducemyself)(trending)(jerrybanfield)
I hope you enjoyed my little satire. Seems like we have been getting a lot of “real" posts very similar to the “perfect specimen” of this one receiving massive payouts.
I would like to continue to write my novel on steemit, but until there is a more equitable solution to getting views that have quality as apposed to pure profites in mind(see My last post), or I build a large enough following interested in it. I will probably just have a bit of fun, occasionally pointing out what I see as the real “Reward Pool Rape.”
Please forgive me for exposing your eyes to such graphic poo.
Please do not be offended if you are Russian, I love virtually every Russian I meet, such a wonderful and strong people.
Please do not be offended if English is not your native tongue. My intentions were not to make fun of people with poor English, I just used it for comical effect.
Just In case it wasn’t obvious that I was joking, I will do none of the above mentioned things if you send me steem.
But if you feel compelled regardless, I’m happy to take any steem you may find lying around.
I have to give a shout out to 
