Deciding who to marry is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. In a kingdom courtship, the major reason for marriage should be the conviction that a particular match is God’s choice for you.
"It should not be just a good choice, but God’s choice"
The chief enemy you fight in choosing God’s best will be your own strong inclination to make a good choice instead of God’s choice. When we decide on our own that we would marry a particular person and refuse to seek or wait for God’s instruction, He will allow you to choose the good. But you will miss the best – His perfect will. The problem is that things don’t work right when you are in only the permissive will of God (1 Corinthians 6:12)
Find out where God is working and join Him there. On the other hand, you are more likely to say, “God, here is the person I want to marry, will you bless us?” the difference is the approach; one approach puts God at the centre while the other puts both of you at the centre.
When you make choices independent of God and then ask for His blessing, you are asking God to approve an idea that originated from you, not Him. God is not your servant to make adjustments to your plans. You are His servant and you adjust your life to what He wants for you.
Even though God gave us the ability to reason and make choices, what did He say about our thoughts compared to His in Isaiah 55:8-9? God’s wisdom and knowledge are far greater than yours. He can see the end from the beginning and He knows you more than you know yourself and the one you choose to marry.
A good idea may work some of the time but God’s idea will work all the time. Proverbs 3:5 warns us not to lean on our own understanding but to trust God whole-heartedly.
"God’s choice for you is far better than your best choice for yourself"
Christians must realize that it’s more important to be certain that a marriage is God’s will than to judge suitability for marriage by love, attraction, or compatibility. Only God knows and can predict future compatibility. The qualities that suggested compatibility and attracted you in the beginning may prove difficult to live within the long run.
The lady who falls in love with a guy’s drive to succeed may eventually find that quality destructive. He may end up spending more time at work than at home when you eventually marry him.
If you lean on your own understanding, you may someday feel like a drowning man or woman. How be it, the more you struggle to keep the marriage intact, the deeper you drown or sink.
God sees what you can’t see and He knows better than you do. Let Him lead you and you will get the best (Bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh).