Phallus of Cthulhu
Original nomenclature CENSORED ! for Political Correctness.
Sculpted vigintillions of years ago by primordial tentacles.
Discovered by our intrepid Zepplineers on a mysterious unchartered island somewhere in the vast South Pacific seas, we now convey to you this ancient fertility fetish.
Magnificently crafted by what seems almost unearthly hands, the incredible adriotness and virtuosity which pervades every essence of this artifact is enthralling yet unrevealing.
Its design and progenitor unknown, it seems to have been fashioned in an epoch beyond our ken.
If I may be as so bold? I must stress a caveat , under no circumstances should one find themselves alone at any given time, within whichever lodgings
with this chalice of beguiling exquisiteness, as it will indubitably descend one into insanity with indefatigable lasciviousness for all and one's self.
Sub lieutenant Septimus
Dirigible / E class, 3rd rate : Horagalles