You have probably heard that women can have clitoral or vaginal orgasms. You might have even read about the debate within academia around whether vaginal orgasms even exist.
However, the experience of many women, my experience as a sexual coach, as well as the testmonies of others all prove that women can actually experience many different and distinct kinds of orgasms.
We can differentiate orgasms by anatomy, the direction of the energy, the strength and length of the orgasm, and by the orgasm's effects on the physical, energetic, emotional, mental and spiritual spheres.
There are a few major erogenous zones in a woman's body. Most women would enjoy the stimulation of these erogenous zones, and it might lead to some kind of orgasm. Some would actually experience a distinctively different orgasm at each area. As they say in real estate: Location, location, location ...
If you are just starting out, don't worry about which is which. Just experiment with the following areas of arousal, and see what works for you.
Before attempting any of these techniques, first get yourself "in the mood": Take a hot bath, put on some sensual music, light candles and incense, and start touching yourself all over your body in a way that excites and arouses you. Don't "try" to have an orgasm. Instead: Explore. Play. Discover. Try. Experiment ... Have fun!
Here are the female-anatomy orgasms — how to reach them:
- Nipple Orgasm
The nipples are an important erogenous zone. They are connected via energy channels to the clitoris, and thus, stimulation of the breasts will cause an arousal of the clitoris and the whole genital area.
Continues stimulation of the breasts and nipples can result in an actual orgasm or can bring about more quickly and easily the onset of an orgasm when vaginal stimulation is applied.
Women with small breasts tend to be more sensitive, but all women can develop sensitivity in their breasts, regardless of size. If your breasts are not sensitive, give yourself regular breast massage and/or ask your partner to do so, at least 20 minutes a day.
How to have a nipple orgasm: Use fingers, a vibrator or your partners mouth to stimulate your nipples. Touch, rub, pinch, pull, kneed, and twist your nipples to explore different sensations. Your partner can lick, suck, and bite them. Try to do this for 20 to 30 minutes, even when they feel a bit sensitive or if the sensation has "plateaued" .
- Clitoral and water Orgasm
A clitoral orgasm is what most women know to be "an orgasm" — intense clitoral stimulation leading to a short peak of orgasm that lasts 20 to 30 seconds, focused mainly in the genital area, and feels intense, sharp, but a bit shallow compared to vaginal orgasms.
The pleasure declines rapidly, your clit might feel hyper-sensitive and even a bit painful, and some women lose their interest and passion for a few minutes or even hours. Even with penetrative sex there are positions that stimulate the clitoris more than others. For example if either partner is on top and leaning forward.
A clitoral orgasm isn't "bad." It just doesn't serve you and charge you like deep vaginal orgasms do.
In order to discover the ecstasy and bliss of continuous internal orgasms, you can try avoiding having a clitoral orgasm for a while. However, after you learn how to turn clitoral stimulation into internal orgasms, it's great to have clitoral stimulation, as long as you can avoid having an explosive clitoral orgasm.
How to have a clitoral orgasm: Apply direct and indirect stimulation of your clitoris using your fingers, a shower-head or water, a vibrator or your partner's mouth. Note that some women love direct and intense stimulation of their clit, while others can only have indirect stimulation through the clitoral hood or sideways through the lips. Experiment with doing the same motion repeatedly for a while or with changing and alternating your touch.
- Vaginal Entrance Orgasm
There are many nerves at the entrance to your vagina, making it a sensitive and erogenous zone. Apart from clitoral orgasm, this is where most women experience pleasure and subsequent orgasm. But compared with the inner areas , the vaginal entrance orgasm is more shallow and sharp, similar to a clitoral orgasm, and might also become explosive.
If a man is penetrating you shallowly, at the area of your vaginal entrance, it feels very pleasurable on a physical level, but when he enters you deeper, the experience of the pleasure becomes deeper, more expansive and meaningful. Size does matter, and so does depth.
How to have a vaginal entrance orgasm: Using your fingers, a dildo or your partner's penis, touch the ring of muscles and tissue at the entrance to your vagina. Use in-and-out movements, circular movements, and apply pressure and stimulation "outward."
- G-spot Orgasm
Originally called the Grafenberg spot after the scientist who "discovered" it. I prefer to call it the "Goddess spot" or the "Good spot".
The G-spot is actually not exactly a spot but an area located just inside your vagina, near the entrance, on the upper wall under the pubic bone. When you are insert your index and middle fingers into your vagina and curl or hook them towards your clit, you will discover that this area feels different than your vaginal walls. It’s like a ridged, soft, fleshy hill that feels like a combination between a hard tongue, and a soft palate. It will be much more engorged and swollen when you are really aroused.
Some women’s G-spot is located closer to the entrance, while others have their G-spot further back. All women have a G-spot. A G-spot orgasm feels like an overwhelming experience of intense pleasure, not as "sharp" as a clitoral orgasm, but rather more, "round," "expansive," and "expanded."
It takes longer to reach a G-post orgasm, it unfolds slower, lasts longer, and the pleasure decreases gradually and slowly, compared to the clit orgasm which usually crashes after the peak.
A G-spot orgasm will be more emotionally intense, overwhelming, and meaningful and will be followed by a deep feeling of satisfaction and relaxation. There will be strong contractions of the whole pelvic floor, pc muscles and vaginal muscles.
With continued stimulation, you could experience more G-spot orgasms, leading to an experience of multiple-orgasms or an intense orgasmic state, lasting for long minutes or even hours. Sometimes there might be an expelling of fluids from the vagina or the urethra, also known as female ejaculation.
How to have a G-spot orgasm: Using your fingers, or better yet, a non-vibrating dildo, stimulate the area mentioned above — 1 to 2 inches inside your vagina on the upper wall, kind of below your clit. Make sure you are wet or use plenty of natural lube.
You might need to keep going for 20 or 30 minutes as this orgasm takes time, but it's soooooo worth it!
While a clitoral stimulation is more technical — rub intensely for long enough and you'll cum — a G-spot orgasm requires that elusive mind-state known as "surrender." As you are stimulating yourself, keep an attitude of openness and acceptance toward yourself and the experience.
You might encounter some pain, discomfort or strong emotions that come up — frustration, sadness, pain — related to past experiences or beliefs. One of the reasons that women don't experience G-spot orgasms is that they don't stimulate (or receive stimulation) for long enough or that they stop when these sensations and emotions come up. Take a moment to express these emotions, and keep going with the stimulation.
- Cervical-Uterine Orgasm
According to the Tantric tradition, a cervical orgasm is probably the most profound, meaningful, and special orgasm that a woman can have, at least on the physical level.
The cervix is the entrance to the womb, the uterus. This is the pole or the center of the feminine energies in a woman's body. A woman's cervix is related to her feminine core, her sense of self, her heart, her creativity, and to her entire being.
A cervical-uterine orgasm will feel deeper, more intense and yet more “round” than the g-spot orgasm, and will be accompanied by strong emotions, love, oneness with self, partner and god, ecstasy and transcendence, tears, crying and a feeling of deep satisfaction on all levels.
The experience of pleasure is deep and profound, but in the same time, the cervical orgasm is perceived and appreciated as an experience that is beyond bodily pleasure, and is often perceived beyond the physical body.
A cervical orgasm is characterized by contractions of the deep vaginal muscles and uterus, while the pc muscle might stay relaxed. It effortlessly causes the sexual energy to move toward the higher chakras. It's related to the naval chakra (Manipura Chakra) but the energy easily rises to the heart chakra and beyond.
This is why a cervical orgasm is a whole-body orgasm, as the energy moves throughout the body. A woman who experiences her first cervical-uterine orgasm will usually remember that day forever.
One of my female teachers said that she could identify when and if a woman had this orgasm because she glows in a special way.
How to experience a cervical orgasm: The cervix is located at the deepest part of your vagina, all the way in. It feels like a finger or the tip of the nose sticking from the back wall of your vagina. You definitely need a long dildo to reach your cervix.
After getting yourself aroused as explained earlier, and stimulating your clit, vaginal entrance and G-spot areas, use your dildo to reach all the way in. You will feel a sensation very deep inside you. In the beginning it might feel numb, tender or even painful. Repressed feelings and memories might come up.
Keep stimulating your cervix and allow yourself to go into and through whatever comes up. It can sometimes take 30 to 60 minutes of internal stimulation to reach a cervical orgasm, and allowing yourself to trust yourself and to surrender is a key aspect of experiencing it.