Photo by Ilyuza Mingazova on Unsplash
This is a story from a man who is very curious about sex and the female form.
I'm a heterosexual man and these are my failures and observations with the female sexual energy.
It has to be mentioned that this energy is much different than the masculine one. And to the ones who identify themselves more with the masculine energy, female sexuality can seem insane, scary, mysterious and even totally confusing.
This energy doesn't move in a straight line like masculine energy.
It doesn't have certain kinds of rules.
It moves up and down, and there's almost no way of knowing which way it will go.
Here are some guidelines that I've observed and that have helped me find more understanding with female sexuality.
Their mood changes really quickly without any real indication of why it changed. It can be really hot and wanting to go but a minute later they are cold, wants to go to the supermarket and tells You that "We don't do anything fun anymore!" At that moment You need to stand Your ground and absorb that intense energy. No need to do anything else really.
If they tell You that they are tired during the night and would love to have sex with You when they wake up in the morning, don't hold Your breath. Their mood has probably changed when morning comes. I know that for the masculine mind with integrity this is a big no-no but do Your best to not hold it against them. For them this is normal.
Women store a lot of emotional pain in their sexual organs. This means that if they haven't let it go in "real life" these emotions will come out during sex. (Because Your penis or something else has stimulated their sexual organs.) Don't be afraid when out of the blue they start crying during sex and blaming You for something that happened weeks or months ago. This is perfectly normal and an emotional release from her. Just do Your best to not take it personally. Some ladies like it when You cuddle them during this. Some probably want space. (I've personally been with ones who want to be cuddled.) Ask Your lady what she prefers.
The needier You are with sex the more of a turnoff that is for her. Best place to be, somewhere around not caring and desiring her greatly.
The more You are frustrated, bitch and moan about, for example, the traffic, the less she is turned on by You. And You will have to start from scratch with building attraction.
Integrity. This is a difficult one because You have to balance with holding her accountable and letting the small stuff go. If You demand integrity with every small detail, she will have to go more into her masculine energy. Something that again will destroy attraction between the two of You. But You can't let her get away with everything as well. Then she'll think You are a pushover, and she can do anything she wants with You. Causing her to lose respect for You in the long run. Just the right amount of letting go and holding her accountable. A very hard task I know.
Make her feel special and the sexiest lady You have ever known. And mean it! She can tell if You are faking it. This means don't look at other women if You are out with her. Although it is true that some women get aroused by their men looking at other ladies, it is more common that they don't.
As a plot twist, I will introduce the following wisdom, You can do everything perfectly, be the best man, sensual and feeling, strong and powerful but she still doesn't want to have sex with You.
Every second with the feminine is a mystery. You have to evolve as You go. These guidelines will hopefully make it a little easier.
Ian Altosaar
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