So many times I have heard the horrible myth that the Church believes that sex is inherently evil. On the contrary, the Catholic Church is the biggest lover of sex; to Her, it is in fact sacred even. The choice that many Catholics make to deny sexual union prior to marriage is a great sign of just how important it is. In the Catechism of the Catholic Church it states, “Sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way only if it is an integral part of the love by which a man and woman commit themselves totally to one another until death."143
The sexual act is not one of just pleasure, but an outward sign of the vows a husband and wife make in their wedding day. They say with their bodies, “I am completely and totally yours until death do us part. All of me.” Just as God gave us his son, a husband gives love to his wife totally and completely. It is for this reason that spouses choose to wait until their wedding night to have sex. Not because they think that sex is bad, but because they value the gift of sex so much! And, as the Catechism of the Catholic Church states below, God also intended sex to be pleasurable for a good and holy reason:
"The acts in marriage by which the intimate and chaste union of the spouses takes place are noble and honorable; the truly human performance of these acts fosters the self-giving they signify and enriches the spouses in joy and gratitude."145 Sexuality is a source of joy and pleasure:
“The Creator himself . . . established that in the [generative] function, spouses should experience pleasure and enjoyment of body and spirit. Therefore, the spouses do nothing evil in seeking this pleasure and enjoyment. They accept what the Creator has intended for them.”
Finally, the Church values and upholds sex to a high degree because of the profound effect it has on spouses. You are no longer two separate people, but one flesh. How beautiful is that?! Another excerpt from the catechism:
“The married couple forms ‘the intimate partnership of life and love established by the Creator and governed by his laws; it is rooted in the conjugal covenant, that is, in their irrevocable personal consent.’147 Both give themselves definitively and totally to one another. They are no longer two; from now on they form one flesh. The covenant they freely contracted imposes on the spouses the obligation to preserve it as unique and indissoluble.148 "What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder."
The catechism has a way of putting to words what I cannot, which is why I have shared these passages with you. My fiancé said to me the other day that sex within marriage will be freeing, to say the least. You can join together as husband and wife with confidence that God wants us to do this, and we both want to do this. No guilt and no shame; Just knowing that the other accepts and loves you for more than just your body.
Sources:
Catechism of the Catholic Church: http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s2c2a6.htm