If you have a look in FB messenger conversation between me and my mom it would look something like this.
See what she is doing? Each time I see a baby photo/video sent by her, they are literally screaming “TIME TO MAKE A BABY; YOUR OVARIES ARE BECOMING STALE”. And when I don’t reply to her facebook messages, she will call me.
Mom : “Hi, darling did you see the last video that I sent to you? Isn’t that baby so CUTE?”.
Me : [Sigh] Yes, mom. I saw them. I also know what they mean. I am working, can we talk later?
Mom : But you are getting old. You will not able to do a baby later.
Me : hm, 28 years old is old? What have I to say about you? Are you ancient now, should I put you in a museum? Please, I already have a baby that weighs 85 kg at home.
Mom : He is your boyfriend. Come on, I want a small niece/nephew. I will take care of them.
Me : Oh, you want to create a mini-monster like me?
Mom: [silence]
And at the same, my boyfriend who is eavesdropping and understand little Albanian : ”Yeah, time to make a baby. So you can quit smoking”. While he is saying this, I am doing the Michael-Phelps death stare alike. “Really? You are supposed to be on my side, not your future mother-in-law’s side who by the way wants a wedding with all of our 500 cousins!”
Let me be clear: I have nothing against babies or kids. No, really, I don’t. I am also glad that other women are having it all: a successful career, great marriage/relationship and the experience of motherhood. The majority of my high school friends are married and on the way of their third baby. Each time I met them, I will be playing with their kids and I love squeezing their little cute cheeks. And then this happens.
My friend : “So when you are due?”
Me : [coughing] hm, what do you mean?
She : [smiling] I see you gained a bit of weight.
Me : [coughing harder] yeah, that’s my food belly.Probably I should reduce eating pizza.
She : Oh, I am sorry. But yeah, you should have a baby. Your hair, your face will look nicer while you are pregnant.
Me : [thinking that I should really not reply to her comment] ...
And you would think that when you meet your single friends, they would agree with you when you start to complain how your mom, your boyfriend, your married friends are all pushing you to become pregnant for a variety of reasons.
Nope. Not the case. She will tell you “Yeah you are settled down with your boyfriend. What are you waiting for? You should take your relationship to the next level.” Arghhh. And I thought I was the most annoying person on this earth, you know.
Let me repeat again. I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST KIDS. I also did babysitter work for a while and I was so good at it, that the boys didn’t want another babysitter except me.
Is this happening only where I live? Everyone around us [women] will once in a while REMIND us that our main purpose on this earth to reproduce. Come on, give me a break.
If I don’t have a kid right now, it’s my choice. I haven’t done a pro-cons list about having a baby. I never said that I am not ready.
The day I decide to conceive one, it won't be because my mom wants a little human to play with, it won’t be because I want a gloomy skin and face, it won’t be because I want to turn my boyfriend to a sperm donor and of course, I don’t think of myself as a reproduction machine. I believe in free will and I would like to think that I still can make some choices.
Sometimes, it’s really hard to keep up with society’s expectation. It really bothers me. And, sometimes, I don’t understand how a conversation moves from the topic of Pokemon Go collection to the topic of my ovaries.
Oh, I just received another baby video from my mom. I gotta go.
While we are at it, again, what’s the deal with everybody and my ovaries?
Photos above are screenshots from FB messenger.