Are you ready for a cosmic adventure of epic proportions? ARE YOU READY to go against all odds to another galaxy and save the human race from extinction?
But why Mr. Ragequit? Why would I leave my lovely blue ball, my little corner of paradise, my only HOME and adventure into the unknown like that?
The answer to that is simple: eventually this planet will not be inhabitable anymore, the star it revolves around will blow up and the galaxy it's situated in will collide with the Andromeda galaxy.
Alright, granted those are all somewhat distant problems and we're facing other serious issues right now.. like should I wear the blue shirt today, is my hair sitting up straight, should I call a cab or an Uber, am I a dog person or a cat person, do I like men or women or both, does my wife like men or women or both? We mustn't however ignore the distant issues because they're complicated and we won't be able to solve them unless we get a head start on them.
And sure, we are still burning mostly fossil fuel today, but the world does (for the most part) seem to be pushing towards renewable energies which is absolutely awesome! We need them and we need them fast, however it's not like I have rivers, wind and photons in the darkness of space, and clearly I can't burn fossil fuel to a distant galaxy even though the coal industry might lead you to believe that.
So we need a star about the size of.. well.. small enough to put it on a fucking space ship okay?
And we need to make sure that we're building the whole damn ship out of materials that won't fail along the way, right? It's a looong way to get out of this galaxy, and if we're moving slower than the speed of light it might take a while. Nothing to give me case of the Mondays like a fucking hole in my space ship, I'll tell you that much..
Alright, so we presumably have a ship, big enough to fit a lot of people, big enough for artificial gravity to also be feasible, we have energy and we're flying towards a different galaxy through the vacuum of space, passing all sorts of celestial bodies along the way. Some of them moving faster then bullets and being bigger than Jesus. Even with all the technology doing all the maneuvering for us, it's still somewhat likely that we'll hit one of those fuckers and we'll probably need to stop and fix something.
Great, so now I need to get out of this space traveling tin can and go take care of that damn hole. To get out there I need a suit that will do a few things for me like provide the needed oxygen, pressure and maintain my body temperature. God I hate that fucking suit, I can't move in it, I have to jump around like a Kangaroo and not to mention how awkward it gets when I get an itch in my ass..
Water we can create at this point, it's simple hydrogen and oxygen okay? If we're trying to get to another galaxy and we can't obtain our two basic elements from space to create water and breathe we should just stop bullshitting ourselves and call it a day.
We should also have no issues of producing our food on a ship this big. We can create controlled environments to grow shit on Earth, we should be able to do it in space.
Another interesting thing though is how we'll perpetuate our species. With such a small pool of people it can become quite a tricky matter. I'd fuck a distant cousin I guess if she's hot enough and if the survival of my species depended on it but do I really haaave to moooom?
It's probably best at this point to just stop having sex and rely on our advancements in genetics and biology to create new people. Think about that for a moment, countless generations that didn't reproduce naturally.. The only reason our reproductive systems would survive this adventure is because we would have control over the genetic material and not allow evolution to take its natural path.
How does society manifest itself without sex for generations on end, does the brain change in any way?
Wouldn't it make more sense to have little to no people on board of this ship and have this whole thing taken care of for us by our machines? They'd have no issues going out into the vacuum of space, they would not need to breathe, eat, reproduce and they would not mentally break down. We would have them find an inhabitable planet for us or terraform one and then incubate human life there.
