There are endless ways to talk about the core message of A Course in Miracles. One is to say, it helps us to end our denial of Truth.
We made a whole world of endless complexity to cover up Truth and to see our preference of individuality and separation instead. So you could say, that there is lots of investment on any level to keep our specialness alive.
This article is a follow-up to ["Let me sleep! I enjoy dreaming!"](https://atmos.black/let-me-sleep-i-enjoy-dreaming) and makes the same core points, while taking a slightly other angle.
We love specialness more than Truth. This is a secret fact, that is tried to cover up by the ego and protected by all means. We can feel special on the material level, the psychological and even (or let’s say very special) on energetic and spiritual levels.
Behind all these specific specialness though, there is the basic need to be an individual. Be aware that this need is at the core of everything we think, feel and do with our ego mind. It’s the heart of this thought system.
From Denial to Responsibility
When people first hear this, they tend to over-read what is said here. We love to think, that we only have an ego sometimes or this is about „other people we know“. Let me say it loud and clear: this is about YOU and your basic need to be special – every time and everywhere! This is meant with the end of denial.
There is one reason, why we don’t want to be responsible for what we experience and have found endless justifications for why we may be responsible in some cases but never totally responsible for everything.
The reason, why we don’t want to be 100% responsible, is called guilt. We think, that if we are responsible for all the mischief we perceive in the world, we are guilty. Guilt is the one thing we are obsessed about, although it is mostly unconscious.
Our first reaction to guilt is to try to get rid of it. We believe, that we can do so through the act of projection. The problem is, that this doesn’t work, since ideas leave not their source. So if you project guilt onto others, the guilt doesn’t leave its owner, which is YOU.
This is an expected result and shows, that behind our rejection of guilt there is in fact an attraction to it. In other words: We want to feel guilty, since this is associated with individuality. For our ego, guilt is a sign, that we are indeed very special and that is what it wants.
To end denial of Truth, we have first end the denial of our attraction to guilt. We have to admit it and this is what responsibility is all about.
What 100% responsibility really means
Most people are not aware, what this means and how far reaching its implications are. I try to put it in easy words: You want everything you experience. Always.
Be aware, that this has nothing to do with the level of form, since there is no inherent meaning in form. Everything only is, what we experience (= perceive) it to be and this happens through our interpretation.
The ACIM Workbook tells us to practice this in Lesson 253 called „My Self is ruler of the universe.“:
> IT IS IMPOSSIBLE THAT ANYTHING SHOULD COME TO ME UNBIDDEN BY MYSELF. EVEN IN THIS WORLD, IT IS I WHO RULE MY DESTINY. WHAT HAPPENS IS WHAT I DESIRE. WHAT DOES NOT OCCUR IS WHAT I DO NOT WANT TO HAPPEN. THIS MUST I ACCEPT. FOR THUS AM I LED PAST THIS WORLD TO MY CREATIONS, CHILDREN OF MY WILL, IN HEAVEN WHERE MY HOLY SELF ABIDES WITH THEM AND HIM WHO HAS CREATED ME. W-pII.253.1.
To reach the place „in Heaven where my holy Self abides“, we have to take full responsibility for what we experience. To be more concrete: We need to take responsibility for our interpretations and judgements.
This doesn’t mean, that we should fight or change our interpretations by our will, but only to look at what we are doing and be aware, that this is exactly what we want.
We love our interpretations and judgements – yes, also the nasty ones! If something bad happens in our life, we also have to take responsibility for it in recognizing, that this is how we want to see it.
To be responsible essentially means, to admit, that we want to judge, because this is what makes us feel special.
How to be responsible without feeling guilty
So we are in a situation, where we want to see the world as we see it – with all its pain and suffering – but on the other hand, try to handle the guilt that comes as a price. This is only an issue though, if you look at the ego with the ego. Luckily we have another thought system in our Mind!
Right out of the factory our minds are delivered with a dual OS. It’s like a PC that comes with Windows and macOS pre-installed. You can choose every moment, which OS you run. I already wrote a lot about the other OS, that is called „the right mind“ in ACIM – another name for it is the „Holy Spirit“.
When you view your need to feel special and take responsibility for it with the right mind, you just look at it and do nothing. You don’t have to change it, fight it or do anything else but looking without judging yourself for being judgmental. Remember, in it’s secrecy lies its only power. Everyone has this basic need for specialness – otherwise we won’t be here. So this doesn’t make you a failure, but only shows, that you are ready for true honesty and the end of denial.
Ending the denial of Truth simply means, to end judging yourself for perceiving the world the way you do and being aware, that your interpretation of the world is always your choice – it may be a mistaken one, but it’s not sinful nor does it make you bad.
The more you see, that with each judgement you are laying the foundation for a separated existence, that is not possible, you forgive yourself these mistakes and through that, start to perceive a guiltless world.
Since projection makes perception, the more guiltless and innocent you see yourself, the world will reflect this choice and peace comes to the forefront of your experience.
Love and Blessings,
Atmos
Posted from my blog https://atmos.black/the-end-of-denial-100-responsibility-0-guilt/