Statesman and gals day 3 is where you get off the ride and admit defeat!
Let’s face it not only have many of you visited Florida on vacation. Many of you are right now freezing in igloo style homes wishing you could afford a vacation right now to Florida. For that, I do feel for your frozen hearts in this war. As some of you might even have purchased some cheap land (swamp land!!!) hoping to escape the clutches of your day to day life in another state.
Floridian Magic!
I’ll let you in on a Floridian magic. We overcharge the daylights out of you suckers! That’s right I’ll admit it. Florida is a tourist state and you pay to play when you come visit us to escape the cold. We will show you some of our southern hospitality alright. Right after you open up your wallets and dump every last cent you own into our pockets!
You think you out of state are going get into 4 Disney parks on the cheap? Forget about it. I could on other hand get a 28$ a month annual pass–good luck getting better (1). Don’t forget we also get some discounts while inside the theme parks as well! It’s not even uncommon for some residents to show up with an annual pass just to eat dinner at one of their world famous dining experiences inside!
Think you are going park on our world famous Daytona Beach? You are right I’m paying for an annual resident pass on that one too. You will spend more on your week or two visits here then I will an entire year. Thanks!
While you are down in Daytona you guessed right you are overpaying on that “discounted” hotel price you got online. Even worse you shop while in the tourist traps that overcharge. You don’t even have to drive that far to get to stores that charge more normal prices. But you being out of state have no clue where those even are. The only state in my opinion that take avenge of you more than we do in Hawaii and let’s face they are too scared to enter into the statewars. Maybe their volcano is acting up or something --who knows.
Year round you can go golfing here. Some of you will fly in for a few nights just to get another round of golf in because you can’t where you live year round. Never mind I’m paying resident prices or even have an annual membership on the cheap if I was into golf—hint I’m not.
Cheap Attractions
So you must be asking yourself where do Floridians go for fun time? I’ll let you in on our trade secret. It’s called the 3-day cruise.
That’s right while your off wasting days at airports to get down to Florida and many times getting delayed due to snow when you try to escape! All we have to do is turn a weekend into an extended 3 day weekend and hop on a cruise ship.
I could right now for only a few hundred bucks have a 3-day vacation off to the Bahamas! How much in airfare and hotel cost are you spending again?
I’ve known a few people who suddenly go on vacation any time a cruise ship lands in the news for “onboard illness” or a number of other things. Why might you ask? Because they deep discount prices to the point you would have to be crazy not to.
Not to mention most of us live within a very short distance to beaches or even have a pool in our own backyards. During the summertime a fun time for me is every day at 1 pm floating in the pool with a nice refreshing drink.
Gatorland
Now, now, not everything you do in Florida has to be “relaxing” we do have a rather interesting park down here most of you don’t even know about. One of them is called Gatorland with thousands of gators. No wonder I’ve not seen one in Florida with my own two eyes outside of a park. They are all off partying inside that place!
For those of you who need that adrenaline rush and get bored easy of beach time down in Daytona or adventures in Legoland was not enough. You could be zip lining over a pool of alligators right now! No joke you looking down into a pool of wild alligators as you zip past them from above. I’ll just stick with my beach life thank you very much.
They even have off road adventure type of excursion if the zip line was not enough for you! Talk about getting up close and personal. Where they take you in on a custom made vehicle.
Why stop there though! Not only could you catch a show of some alligator wrestling (they could never pay me enough do that!) You could enjoy watching them being fed. They even have one gator that is blue-eyed and white!
I’m sure some of you are thinking “I want to pet some gators!!!! They do have a petting zoo. I won’t spoil what goes on in that one. I can only hope you enjoy it.
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