Hello there. Oliver's Olive Oil corporation reporting. We are the largest distributor of olive oil in the world, with olive oil dispensaries all over the world. Our olive oil ATM is highly successful, and people cannot get enough olive oil! Olive oil is historically a volatile commodity, much like STEEM is in recent history (although not that volatile!).
Here's how we operate:
You can buy olive oil from us, like any other normal olive oil company, but you now have the option to HODL it! We keep track of the volume of olive oil you own, and you can choose to dispense it at any time, or request that we ship you the olive oil, which we then deduct from your holdings. This olive oil balance can also be transferred to anyone else that has an account with us.
So you know, because olive oil is a precious commodity, if you want to use it for trading on the market and have fun with that stuff, you can choose to do so. In other words, your olive oil balance is basically like a cryptocurrency! Only centralized.
How do you know we have the olive oil we say we do? Well, in the spirit of full transparency we have live webcams at all of our storage units. Or you know, whatever it is that would convince you that have the olive oil we say we do.
OOBAD
But there's more! Last year we launched a new loyalty program, where we distribute certificates as a token of thanks. They are called OLIVE OIL BACKED DOLLARS, or OOBAD for short. The way it works is that 1 OOBAD can be redeemed for exactly 1 USD worth of olive oil at our ATM's (or online, which we ship to you).
There are a few ways to earn OOBADs.
- The more olive oil you purchase, the more OOBADs you get. Roughly works out to a 10% discount if you average it all out.
- You can invest in our company, and you will receive OOBADs as distributions.
- OOBADs can be transferred from one person to another, so in theory you can simply exchange it or buy it from exchanges!
The amount of OOBADs we distribute will be fully auditable, and will correspond to what the market is willing to allow us to distribute as dividends. So no, we won't simply throw them out like crazy, because after all if we can't honor the certificates because we are out of olive oil we'd be in trouble too. We will not issue more than 10% of the market cap of olive oil, and that will ensure that your OOBADs can be honored forever.
A Strange Phenomenon
Lately we've seen some pretty strange behavior. OOBADs are a hot commodity! In informal exchange locations like Craiglist, we are observing that people are willing to purchase OOBADs for way more than the redemption rate of 1 USD worth of olive oil per OOBAD. It's as if people don't understand they aren't actually worth that much. Maybe it's because they are too damn pretty in paper form.
The more successful our company, the more OOBADs we will distribute, so I suppose this hype will die down eventually. Either that or if our corporation has trouble that runs it into the ground, that would make all of this evaporate. Only time will tell. But as long as we are successful, time will ultimately prove me right. Anyone else want in on our fabulous company?
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