I was having some rather morbid thoughts about dying and what would people remember about me.
I had a stunning self awareness moment. I have kids and people will remember that I love them, and of course my family will miss me. Then I realized that I couldn't think of how I could have impacted anyone elses lives.
It was a groundbreaking realization that I in fact may be introverted.
I have always consideredy self extroverted. I get along well with people, and I am ok with being in new places and being able to aclamate to new surroundings.
With this new revaltion, I discovered that almost all my relationshipe are superficial. I don't have many close friends, having trouble thinking of one other then family or my boyfriend. I was shocked by this and deeply saddened. I don't think anyone could say they know me, and that I have had a positive influence on them in any specific way.
After I made this discovery many questions arose..
Why have I failed to make close relationships? Are there people who consider me a close friend and I just failed to realize? Am I shallow? What now? Am I too old to make a change and deepen my relationships? Should I look for more like minded people? Am I a product of my environment?
Answers to the questions and more I'm part 2. ThankS for reading and please share a personal story or leave a question or comment.