Yesterday I have sneezed quite a bit and the stiffening of my torso while I sneezed made some cracking sound on my back and then my rib cage got hurt. Now it hurts a lot but I can manage. I hope that an aspirin that I took awhile ago would cause some relief as the pain makes a bad discomfort when I roll over on my side.
But this pain just wants me to cry because of its nature as it does really make me feel it everytime that I inhale and exhale air from my lungs because of the movements of the rib cage which is the source of the pain. Sometimes i wanted to think to end it all for good when there is pain that I am feeling in my body because it is just a torture for me or anyone for that matter.
To make matters worse I also have to endure this difficulty in my breathing which makes my nurses apprehensive in taking out water in my body. They wanted to increase my dry weight which I protest not to because it will minimize my margin on how much water that I can intake and it will make me become more breathless easily like today.
My hands are tied and I have much dilemma on my health issues that I do not now what to do anymore but to just continue on with my life and do the things that I know is the right thing to do and stick to it. My fear of being on a breathing apparatus one day is coming near and I hope just to die before it comes as I can't bear the difficulties that it will do to me once it does happen, God help me.