I always look forward to reading
's writing class notes or attending the live class. Unfortunately, her class falls on a Monday (Australian time). It was just that something came up and she had to change it just for this week's session to Monday night. Luckily for me this week, it fell on Tuesday morning. I don't normally work on Tuesdays, unless I am called in to cover someone else's roster.
So, yes, I'm glad I was able to attend
"3 Brave souls that agreed to expose themselves in Monday's writing class".
The entries were:
- A Thin Line Between Adventure and Disaster, Or: Help, I Need an Adult by
- Steemit Meetup Planning in Philippines & Thailand by
- Mine
Yes, I am one of the willing guinea pigs volunteers.
The areas that were pointed out regarding my post were:
1. "The attention grabbing headline."
The title of my submitted entry was "The Main Models in Raising Bilingual (or Multilingual) Children and How to Support Them", but after the class, I edited the title and changed it to "How to Raise and Support your Child to be Multilingual". I believe it is a much better title compared to what it was originally.
2. "The engaging opening."
My first three paragraphs could have been improved if I had added an introduction why I wrote the post in the first place. The post was my response to 
3. "Who is Dr. Eisenchlas? Why should I care or believe what she has to say about raising multilingual children?"
It was negligent and wrong for me to assume that everybody who would read my post would know who the source of my research was. I admit, when I wrote it, I was in a hurry to submit it, without thoroughly proofreading it, not that it is a valid excuse.
In my other posts, How do you Help your Children Build a Rich Vocabulary Day by Day? and How to Read Creatively and Artfully: Making the Most of your Story Reading and Sharing Experiences, I properly referenced my source and described the author who she was in the field of Early Childhood in a paragraph contained in my post.
The critique also made me review my other post, My Literacy History: How I have Developed and Continued to Grow my Love for the English Language, and I referenced an author without an explanation who I was referring to.
I clearly did not take into account the dynamics of the Steemit community. Again, I cannot assume that people will take my word just because I referenced an author, how much more when I don't even explain who they are and what they are expert in. Also, it's important that I...
4. "No additional picture, other than the thumbnail, to add a little spice." (paraphrased)
I agree. So in this post, I have added a few photos that will hopefully make it interesting to read.
5."The subheading could have been a little better."
Read #3.
6."Clearly edited with minimal or no typos" and "concise"
I used "more fluent" when "fluent meant fluent". It's the extra glue word that I must also observe in writing. Other sentences could have been proofread and edited.
7. "Logical flow" and "clear goal"
said that my post follows a logical flow, however, if my introduction paragraph was engaging or "enticing", it could have been a lot better. The flow of the paragraphs from beginning to end also leads to and gives a clear goal - which is to inform and to educate readers on how to raise and support multilingual children.8. "Powerful close"
My post lacks a powerful close. I totally agree. I must remember that Steemit is a community. As a writer on this platform, I would want people to engage with me. So a closing paragraph with prompting people to leave comments or share similar experiences or give additional ideas would be ideal.
So, that's about all of it. After the session, I wanted to edit my post right away, however, I thought of writing a summary of the critique, and this is it. I changed the title only; the rest is unedited.
You may want to check, scrutinise and give your own "constructive criticism", here's the link again: https://steemit.com/steemiteducation/@evlachsblog/the-main-models-for-raising-bilingual-or-multilingual-children-and-how-to-support-them.
Also, if you want to participate in
("the founder")
("the investor")
("the graphic designer"; and, I can't believe he's only 19)
(thank you for your "thunder")
,
,
,
("the ambassadors")
Again, I want to say many thanks to
So, come and join, and be inspired!!!
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