While the public perception of a salesman is not always the best, one thing is for sure. The ladies love Closers. Why wouldn’t they? We are some of the funniest, most interesting characters in the world. We have experiences every day that normal people can’t even fathom.
When a sharp dressed salesman hops out of his clean ass ride and grabs his briefcase, any lady within 100 feet and eye contact is not responsible for her actions. We have everything a woman wants in a man. Good job, killer threads, great grooming and magnetic confidence.
I think every chick should date a successful sales dude at one point in their life. Especially before they settle down. They need a taste of what it’s like to be with a hunter who goes out and closes sales daily to feed himself.
Ladies: if you don’t at least date one salesman in your life you could end up settling down with some lame duck and you would not even know he’s lame. Sad. Here are 11 reasons why you should at least date one Closer before you settle down.
We Have Extreme Confidence: It’s no secret that ladies love a man with confidence. It’s one of the most primal attractions there is between a man and woman. We salesmen have an overflowing amount of confidence. We professionally change the mind of strangers every day. That takes confidence, it ain’t for the meek.
We Know How To Party: Salesman love to celebrate. After bonuses, big commission checks and all that fun stuff we went through hell to get, we like to reward ourselves. Trips to Vegas, bottle service at top local clubs, you name it we do it to enjoy our accomplishments.
We Know How To Talk To People: A salesman never waits in line at the club. They close the bouncer on letting them skip the line. We order all the right things from the bar. We treat the valets with respect and also those who serve us. This makes people like us everywhere we go. It’s nice to be the chick on that guy’s arm.
We Have Lots of Connections: In my case, I’ve sold so much stuff to so many people that everywhere I go, people seem to know me. I also know salesmen in damn near every industry that I trade referrals with. We got the hook up that’s what we do.
We Are Very Spontaneous: The guy with the 9-5 salaried job can’t drop what he’s doing and spontaneously fly you to Vegas to have a blast. He’s got too much to lose, a budget and all those issues. Not us, we make our own money and rules so if we hit a lick, we celebrate. Also, most of us make our own hours.
We Are Good in The Sack: It is what it is. Most of us workout, have great body language and can pick up on others really quick. This translates over to the bedroom, too. Plus, we have a lot of aggression to release.
We Look Sharp: We dress the part every day. Most of us are in suits and ties. This means if you meet us for a date right after we get off work, we still look sharp, unlike most dudes. We know we have to dress to impress our prospects so we stay on top of our thread game.
We Are Full of Energy: There’s no such thing as a successful and boring salesman. We have to have energy in order to keep the attention of the prospect. This is good for you ladies, too. We pay attention when you talk, we engage you and all those things your normal dudes don’t do.
We Are Hilarious: Half of our job is to make people laugh and smile when they are buying from us. We have more stories and jokes than we can remember. After you get a few drinks in us we just might tell you a few but make sure you don’t take a drink during the punchline.
We Know How To Shut Down Drama: When the drunk guy hits on you despite you telling him you’re with someone, we know how to defuse the drama in a cool way. Sure we can fight. We are competitive too, but every day we deal with heat, so it’s no big deal for us to easily diffuse situations the normal dude would only make worse.
We Make That Money: “Girls don’t like boys, girls like cars and money.” Good news is most of us have both. As a salesman, our goal is to get paid as much as possible as often as possible. We grind 25/8 and anyone who dates us gets to experience the fruits of our labor with us.
If you’ve never dated a successful salesman, you owe it to yourself to try it at least once. Unless you’re a boring chick, I bet you will never want to date a lame duck again. We may not always be marriage material but we are always that guy you tell stories to your friends about for years to come.
If you’re wondering how to find a salesman so he’ll ask you out on a date, go to the luxury car dealership; go to the model home of a builder development; go to a jewelry store or anywhere expensive goods and services are sold. The dude that walks up and asks you how he can help, that’s the one you want to flirt with…
The Hardcore Closer