Whether it's 95/5, 80/20, 60/40 or 55/45 etc., It has been scientifically proven that body language is the predominant form of communication when it comes to human-to-human socializing.
Have you ever wondered why some people just seem to ooze charisma and do very well with business deals and relations with the opposite sex, while others no matter what they try can't seem to get a leg up?
The answer to this question is body language! Think about it, you can have the perfect words to say but if you have your shoulders slumped, head down, and mumble when you talk, no one will care about what you have to say.
In fact, there are specific rules about how you can boost your social responses by different tweaks on how you carry yourself (aka your Body Language). So without further ado:
The 5 Body Language Tips for Success with Dating and Business (and Life In General)
Eye Contact
They say the eyes are the window to the soul. This is because we can tell how comfortable a person is by looking in them in the eyes. When you are walking look people in the eye, with a relaxed and friendly look like you would when looking at a puppy or baby. This shows you are confident, in a non-threatening way. When talking to people try to maintain eye contact 80% of the time when you are talking and 60% when they are talking to you. This shows that you value what you're saying and that they must work to keep your attention. If you get nervous when making eye contact, just look at the bridge between their eyes above their nose
Vocal Tonality
When you are talking to someone, you want to command their attention. There are three kinds of tonalities:
Seeking Rapport (Voice goes up at the end of a sentence)
Neutral Rapport (Voice stays flat throughout)
Breaking Rapport (Voice goes down at the end of sentence)To illustrate this, imagine a drawing of three lines on top each other, first one curved up, second straight, and third curved down. You want to avoid trying for rapport at all costs as this suggests weakness/timidity and uncertainty. Of course, always being in breaking rapport tonality would be weird as it would seem as though you are shouting at people. You want to stay in the sweet spot between breaking rapport and neutral rapport. Breaking rapport is used to show that you are confident in what you're saying and to gain attention when beginning a conversation.
Posture
As far as posture goes, when you stand, stand tall and straight as if you had a string going through your head into the ground. Roll your shoulders back so your torso makes a curve in your back. Standing with feet shoulder width or slightly farther than shoulder width apart gives balance and looks confident to onlookers and also shows your not afraid to take up space which is a very attractive trait.
Walk
When you walk, there are two kinds of ways of walking that portray confidence. One is the slow, assured stroll. This is basically just focusing on where you are headed and making slow and controlled movements. Walking tall and open, at your own pace, is very attractive.
The second way is the on-the-go, fast-paced/focuses walk. This walk shows that you are on your path and have important places to be. It is brisk, without being hurried. Take long strides with your legs and you will find that people will give you space to get to where you are going.
The Smile/Smirk
A good smile is very contagious and can help you approach someone who at first may not have been receptive to your approach and determine whether or not someone will in fact be receptive to your approach. Say you are in a bar and you see someone you would like to start conversing with, what you can do is lock eyes with them, then give them a slow smile and see how they react. If they react positively, then you can go talk to them. If they give you a negative reaction, it probably wouldn't have gone well anyway. When practicing your smile, you do not want to overdo it and start grinning like a crazy person! What you should do is instead imagine someone told you a funny joke that you are slowly realizing the punch line. Make a genuine smile of happiness.
When you smirk, it is kind of like a sexy, flirtatious invite for someone to engage you. Reserve this for situations you have utmost confidence in as being too cocky can be a turn off. Smirking is really just a half-smile, with an eye-squint. Both smiles and smirks can and should be practiced in the mirror until you are comfortable.
And that, my friends, is the 5 Tips of Body Language for Dating and Business.
Until next time...