Are we including parents who treat children like dolls?
"After learning this ... tonight music lessons, tomorrow you go to race, weekend too."
While playing dolls, we are free to do whatever we want to the doll. Can choose clothes, shoes, hairstyles, names, professions, how we like. His name is also a doll ... does not have the ability to choose alone and have no feelings.
Unfortunately, when it became a parent ... many who still treat their children like a doll. The child has no choice, no freedom, there is only the necessity to indulge his parents' obsession. It's as if the child has no feelings.
Parents often mean well, want their children to be great personal achievement, but parents need 1 main key in order not to make passive child like doll, that is communication.
We need to respect the choice of the child, so it's important to communicate and ask the child's consent before deciding on something for them.
Get used to give explanations and approval of children. It is better if the child is given several options so they do not feel forced to answer "Yes".
Never threaten the child, "If you do not want to ... mean you do not love moms," this is a subtle coercion, the child will feel helpless.
How was the Prophet Ibrahim alaihissalam teaching his son, Ismail, even to do God's command that clearly should not be rejected ... Prophet Ibrahim remained in communication and sought his son's approval.
Why is it important not to treat a child like a doll?
- Children are not used to making decisions
Everything has been designed by parents, so the child is not accustomed to choose and make decisions based on his own desires and judgments. This will carry over to adult children.
- Children bury anger and disappointment in the parents
Parents feel they have chosen the best for the child, but look at the deh ... lest the child disappointed and angry with the life path you choose for him without his consent.
In the end ... the child can 'revenge' when someday mature, ie by fleeing from the power of his parents.
- Children lose the beauty of their childhood
Many unconscious parents have eliminated the beautiful childhood of their child's life. Because of the obsession of parents, children are schooled in fullday school for example, full of tutoring and this course-that, so the time is not left to just play with his friend.
If that's what the child wants ... it does not matter, the problem is if the child wants to be free to play but is forbidden by the parents for this reason, and the time of the game should be replaced with something else.
it is not easy to be a parent ... but also not difficult if we balance our decision between the mind with the heart. Brake our obsession with children, let them also choose and make decisions. May Allah make us responsible parents.
References :
( http://www.ummi-online.com/anak-bukan-boneka-ini-keburukan-memaksa-anak-menuruti-keinginan-orangtua.html)
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