"Attack!! The boy runs around with a pot on his head, a woodenspoon for a sword and a lid for his shield."

This is the current stage of our household. Anything goes.

(My son, 4 years old, playing knights)

We always embrace his pretend play, because through this we believe we connect with him, learn him life lessons and sometimes even skills. But after having a discussion with a parent at our school who is also a Clinical Psychologist, about how far is to far for pretend play it got me thinking. (Her eldest is 5 and is also at the pretend play stage.)

Why is pretend play important?

Social and emotional skills develop:
They experiment with social and emotional roles of life. They learn to take turns, to be responsible and to solve problems. They develop empathy by "pretending to walk in someone else shoes. They also develop a self-esteem because they can be anyone and can do anything.
Language skills
When the children play they begin to put words into the right context, they speak correctly. This is mostly because through pretend play they mimic their parents.
Thinking skills
They have to device plans, what will work, what can they use as a shield, a sword etc. This enables them to think critical and creatively.
Creative thinking

Now here is the catch.

When is pretend play going to far?

When the "pretend" friend becomes the scapegoat for when a child doesn't want to do something (picking up toys, cleaning a mess etc.)
When your toddler isn't making friends, only playing with the "pretend" friend.
When playing "pretend" play with friends become inappropriate; like playing doctor-doctor.
When "pretend" play between friends become unbalanced. When one kid is always dominating, is always the queen or the imperious one.
When "pretend" play becomes violent.