What does the Steem want with me? Here I am, all-powerful Timelord, flitting about the Steem streams of time trying to organize a rabble of misfits to complete missions, but towards what end? I'm beginning to think the Steem is making a huge joke at my expense.
A new crew called The Darths answered the call and were given their important mission.
A rebellion is in its infancy on the Planet Shabba. Squash it before it begins. Use maximum force. The Qluegnishea CANNOT be allowed to rule.
Led by the overthinking Darth Speed - 
Ani-won Kirsten - 
Noont Ewan - @Hazem91 joined in the Poop Wars. Mistaking “If things get ugly, find their queen, kidnap her and we’ll reach out after six days. Ah, and beware her magic spells when you carry her” with “If things get ugly, find the queen, take a nap with her and if you’re lucky enough, have sex with her and they will beg you to marry her,” he somehow saved the day, The Steem knows how...
Jayna the Hutt from Fatooine - 
Crew of the RS Flying Wardrobe. A closing down sale is about to start in the Zzzzzzqqww quadrant. Fill your ship with bargains and await further orders. Or. Bad. Things. Will. Happen.
Piloted by R2-BEX2 - 
Missing his pants, despite transforming from his previous petunia form, Carnif-Geb - 
At the other end of the Galaxy and in another Steem Stream, Sarah Connor - 
Aboard the Intangible, disassembled droid Sixty - Wine - 
Miss Fixit - 
Meanwhile the good...ish Captain Trickle - 
Visit Whoopass 5 and meet with a delegation of Xripaq leaders. The Steem does not know why, but it is vital to our survival. This message will not self destruct after 5 seconds, that would be silly.
Her selfish plan involved travelling to Laegur to pick up a fare, the fat anarcho-capitalist Lain Dakota - 
The Steem stirs and The Steem flows, calling another to a quest. Bounty Hunter Kaber Tauss - 
Finally, Meme Lord @Sircork performed feats of meme magic, bringing the full power of the Meme to the Steem.
Dr. Muxx cradled his sonic pencil, rocking back and forth. The Steem will be the end of me. Why can NOBODY do as instructed? Still, what The Steem wants, it usually gets, one way or the other. Rubbing the area where his second brain resides, The Good Doctor decided he needed help. Mortals were out of the question, they would not be able to adjust to the multiple timelines he would have to traverse. No, there was only one...
Dr. Muxx shuffled to a corner of the RETARDIS and rummaged through shelves filled with dusty boxes. It had been a while since he was forced to shut down his maniacal AI system, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Finally he found the object of his search, a nondescript box marked with the letters MB and a bright red label that read 'DO NOT OPEN'.
He opened it. A faint red glow still glowed within. Good, that will save me recharging him. Dr. Muxx removed a small mechanical dohickey, blew on the dusty contacts and plugged it into the RETARDIS. A hum rattled the ship, lights dimmed and a mechanical voice boomed throughout.
Muxxybot online ...*...
...%...Systems 80% functional ...&...
...£...Snark module engaged ...*...
...*...Primary directive: rule the galaxy ...$...
Hello old friend.
Until next week, may the Steem be with you.
* * *
Will YOU answer the call? Steem Wars is a community-wide event to encourage writing, mutual support, and blockchain interactions. Who knows, perhaps a friendship or two might form. Anybody can take part, form crews or go it solo. Not a writer? No problem. Artists and poets depicting Steem Wars stories are welcome to join in too. Visit The Writers' Block Discord server and ask for access to Steem Wars. And above all, remember to have fun! There are no rules, any sci-fi franchise can be 'appropriated' and mashed up, although please make them parodies rather than fan fiction. See the original proposal for Steem Wars here.
