Joe loves the sport of athletics; she participates enthusiastically in all events – from running (middle and long distance events), to jumping, sprints and hurdling. Her favorite though is swimming. Joe has a muscular physique. She is tall with a defined torso, long arms and broad shoulders.
Religiously, every afternoon including holidays, Joe practices her strokes. So it came as no surprise when she was announced the winner of the girls under 13 best swimmer on breast and sidestrokes. Oh her parents could burst of pride and for Joe the hours and hours of practice each day, sometimes stiff and sore arms and legs, paid off.
As Joe continued swimming and workouts, she developed into a fine young athlete with lots of potential and the Olympic sports winking at her. Competitive swimming was definitely what she had in mind to further her career one day.
At school everyone knows her name and wanted to befriend her. Everyone except Mr Jones, or so it seems. Mr Jones is the school’s sports coach for all grades. He is a very strict old man with almost never a smile on his face. But he comes qualified and highly recognized as a sports coach.
“I don’t think he likes me”, Joe complains to her mom one afternoon. “Nothing I do is ever good enough. All he sees is the mistakes I make, he never compliments me on the strokes I do well.” Mom was listening to Joe complaining, she could hear the frustration in her daughter’s voice but she also has got to know Mr Jones and his reputation as rigid and stern, leaving no stone unturned when it comes to his good name and the athletes under his wing. “It will get better my baby,”her mother encouraged her. “The words with which a child's heart is poisoned, whether through malice or through ignorance, remain branded in his memory, and sooner or later they burn his soul.”
But it didn’t. In fact, it got worse. In practises, Mr Jones would bend menacingly over her in the swimming pool, yelling at her like a deranged lunatic, calling her “slow Joe” and she would flinch as the others were staring at her. It affected her in such a way that she lost all self confidence in her abilities. His criticism was degrading, hostile and discouraging. It escalated to a level where Joe developed “attacks” as a result of having to interact with Mr Jones and the other athlete’s inquisitive faces. It started out with a pounding racing heart, sweating, shaking, shortness of breath, nausea and chest pain.
“The words with which a child’s heart is poisoned, whether through malice or through ignorance, remain branded in his memory, and sooner or later they burn his soul.”
― Carlos Ruiz Zafón, The Shadow of the Wind
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The school rushed her to the nearest hospital and contacted her mother. After a thorough medical examination, it was found that she suffers from panic attacks caused by severe stress. The doctor explained that panic attacks are associated with a very abrupt onset of intense fear because of a threat happening right now. He said these types of episodes can send patients to the emergency room as they imitate heart attacks.
Joe’s mother was stunned to hear just how critically her child was frazzled. She felt an intense gnawing guilt as she recalled their recent conversations about Mr Jones. Thinking back, how could she not have seen the now ‘so obvious’ signs!? The loss of appetite, withdrawal from activities she once so enjoyed, not wanting to go to school…Tears filled her eyes as she was watching her sweet little girl.
Joe’s mom took her to a Psychologist who is teaching Joe healthier and more effective ways to cope. She is also undergoing psychotherapy known as cognitive-behavioral therapy, which is also highly effective treatment for the disorder. Joe and her mom learned that avoidance can backfire and feed the anxiety.
Joe’s mom has scheduled a meeting with Mr Jones. She presented him with the facts and asked him to respond. She wasn’t satisfied by all the excuses of his behavior towards Joe and for that reason she took it to a successive administration level – from principal to school committee.
Doing so, she reassured her child that she will prevent this teacher from verbal abuse in any shape or form, not only towards her but all the other children. She praised her for having the courage to speak the truth when it comes to unkind treatment. Kids should never be subjected to this type of treatment from any adult, certainly not from the teacher entrusted with their social and emotional development. She asked to get an update on the progress.
As for Joe….she got a new training coach and is thriving again. She has won the National championship for aquatics sports for swimming. She and her parents were overjoyed!!
What Should I Do If My Child Was Mistreated at School?
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Signs and Symptoms of a Panic Attack:
Panic attacks involve sudden feelings of terror that strike without warning. These episodes can occur at any time, even during sleep. People experiencing a panic attack may believe they are having a heart attack or they are dying or going crazy. The fear and terror that a person experiences during a panic attack are not in proportion to the true situation and may be unrelated to what is happening around them. Most people with panic attacks experience several of the following symptoms:
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Panic attacks are generally brief, lasting less than 10 minutes, although some of the symptoms may persist for a longer time. People who have had one panic attack are at greater risk for having subsequent panic attacks than those who have never experienced a panic attack. When the attacks occur repeatedly, and there is worry about having more episodes, a person is considered to have a condition known as panic disorder.
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