This was amazing!! You didn't bring me into the story, you yanked me! I could taste that cake! I've fasted before a diet and my body remembered the way it felt through your words, the cravings and hunger pains, all of it.
His eyes looked like black circles of missing space as if an artist had abandoned a work-in-progress portrait.
Utterly brilliant description, painting with words. I was so engrossed that by the time I finished I'd forgotten it was a short story! Fantastic!