Hi Steemers! I just want to share to you my story of love, I guess. :) I hope you support this one and with the upcoming part 2 also. Enjoy reading!
Original Edited Photo
"Nothing!" I said.
Her eyes turn big and heavy like a dark cloud that is about to pour. She becomes speechless and uncertain.
"That's what you want to know right? So that's it!"
"No, Norman! I mean, I don't get it! It's been three years now, and this is how you want to end it? It's ridicolous!"
"Yes!" Almost three years of pressing ourselves believe that it would work, of hardly trying, of being fools wishing to be us. So, I guess it is better to cut the struggle off now.
"Guess? You guess without thinking what would I feel? I cannot imagine how star-crossed your feelings towards me, Norman! Yeah, you are right! We tried, we both hardly tried. And don't tell me that you're tired now. We tried because we were both wounded and hoped that this so red, so rich and so alive wounds would heal by starting something new. Something that we both have controlled- to love each other and to keep this love away from those stuffs that we regret because we let it happen and let it haunt. Don't tell me that all you promised are lies. Don't cut me off this way Norman."
"Heather, please listen to me. I realize how incredibly confusing things are between us right now. I cannot even begin to explain our relationship. You probably can't either. And we are just both confused."
"Enough, Norman. I am fucking tired hearing your excuses."
Our conversation ended. Heather walked out and left the scented flowers and the painstalkingly wrapped box of her favorite chocolate with almond nuts I bought for her.
This is what I find pain most. I can't go straight what Heather needs to know. And more about the foreboding, she will not understand. I don't want to hurt her but this is the only way I know. If there is another way, which I doubt there is, I would rather choose the one that would cause less pain. I admit, am a freak. This could not happen if I was not that desperate and weak. And the worst, Heather should not feel hurt and burn out if I told this to her early rather confessing it now that it has been three years.
The day falls without any text back from her. I have been trying to reach her for several times. Her phone rings but she bothers not to pick it up. After all what happened today, I would not expect that she still willing to hear my voice.
I grab a book to read, and a line from Tom Robbins struck me.
"Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance between memory and wish, between contentment and need."
Things set off to bother, memories begin to flash back. I can fee the pain inside. Pain couples with remorse and perplexity. And I unconsciously fall asleep holding the book.
I woke up. I checked my phone immediately expecting a mesage from her. I got one but not from her.
"I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU. Seeing you makes me long for love. But neither of us loves the other like we used to. So we are stuck in the middle. Me, trying to make eye contact. You, trying to avoid it. Finding those few seconds where our gazes meet and a reminiscent whisper silently passes our ears. Neither knowing what the other is thinking, but both our thoughts are no longer in the room. I still can't seem to grasp what we have become." It says.
I checked my facebook account and loaded my newsfeed. Heather just updated her status an hour ago.
"You are the meteor I tried to catch. The slight glimmer in the sky that caught my attention with its beauty, but killed me at once." She posted.
Heather was my best friend since high school. She knew everything about me but certainly not for one thing. Nothing is bad on our friendship. Not that I do not trust her. There is this one thing that uou have been keeping and cannot share to anyone even to your diary.
That was October when we decided to take our friendship to another level. Everyone looks at us saying we are best match, perfect lovers and that we are both lucky to have one another. Others who have been saying that it will be us for some time and see us now feel delighted and inspired while saying, "I know right!" But they are wrong. I am neither Heather's prince charming nor his white horse. We decided to take our friendship to another level not because feelings are mutual but because we were both weak.
Before us, Heather was in a terrible relationship. I, on the other hand had been fighting the demon inside. I was been lost and tried to cope up with the things I wished did not happen.
Heather was into Peter. Their relationship lasted for almost two years until she decided to cut off the pain she endures. Peter cheated on her several times. Heather gave him second chances and couple of chances. I understand why she did that. She is no different to any other girl who wants to fix a relationship while there is a chance. But the very last was dreadful.
That was Saturday. And it's Heather's birthday. She got a message from Peter,
"Hi Muffin! Happy birthday! I love you as always. I'm on the apartment right now with my classmates. We are working on our group project. I'll pick you up later around 7. Let's dine in somewhere and celebrate your birthday."
"I love you more Muffin! Wow! Sure I will meet you up later. Mom and Dad are here. They want to see you. Take care. Don't forget to take your lunch", she texted back.
7:30 came and Heather got no message back from Peter. She tried to call him but he is out of reach. She waited, until she decided to go to Peter's apartment. At those times, she expected Peter was still with his friends still working on their project. She decided to head a quick drive thru to bring something to eat. When she headed to the room, there she heard a girl's voice seemingly on cloud nine. She slightly opened the door and peeped over to see what's going inside. There she caught Jane, Peter's ex-girlfriend who was so happy of how Peter pinned her on the bed while he is kissing her neck.
What she saw was enough. She leaves on the apartment crying while swearing to herself that it would be her last time to cry over Peter. She's driving back home when she called me.
"Norman, he cheated on me again. I saw him with Jane on his room, she said while sobbing."
"Oh no! With that bitch again?"
"Yeah! He told me he is working on their project. But that was another fucking lie, I should have not believed him. And this would be the very last time I will cry for him."
"That's fine. Let's talk. I am at house now. I'll prepare some drinks."
We talked about what happened. I just let her to cry and express the pain she endured. She deleted every photo she had with Peter. All of the messages from him and added him on her contact's block list. Heather was not in good condition that very time. What happened to her was wretched and it all happened on her birthday. So I promise to myself that I will be her beau in the meantime. She was my best friend. And it does not feel good when you know that somebody hurts someone who means a lot for you. To help her cope up with the situation I spend my time with her. We took our lunches together and tried find time to see every day in spite of our busy schedules. Often times, you will find us at cafe house checking each other and studying our lessons. We have been doing this until we used to. On that day and the succeeding days, it got sweeter. I was so happy that she finally moved on. And she was very thankful also that I was there on her peaks and valleys. But all of those things I was doing towards here were just "best friend-sake things". I did not expect that she will take it seriously to the point that she had been sending me sweet messages time to time and started to call me babe or honey bunch.
Dont forget to follow me. Kudos!