Enough With Your Wet Towel and Dirty Water
[Letter to bad neighbor]
Dear Loud Mouth,
I have always felt shitty living near to you. You are the most ugly neighbour a person could ever meet.
Therefore, you must understand how difficult it has been for me to approach you with this matter.
I'm afraid I can no longer stand your singing in my shower.
I lay in bed last night, trying to sleep, and all I could think about was how your towel is too wet and your water way too dirty. I had a nightmare that you burst in through the window brandishing a peanut butter scraper.
I have to insist that you take action to stop your singing in my shower from upsetting me. I demand that you give me back my key then eat the potato.
And while we're on the matter, I'm finding your ferocious potato increasingly inexcusable. This is not the kind of behaviour I expect from somebody living in a crappy neighbourhood like Lazy Terrace.
If you don't rectify the situation I shall have no choice but to call your mom and post photos of your singing in my shower on Steemit.
Furthermore, I have close ties with The Three Musketeers and I won't be be afraid to cash in a few favours if you don't comply with my demands.
Thanks
The Invisible Man
