I have found it so hard to be a mother throughout my illness/es - which began shortly after the birth of my daughter almost nine and a half years ago. Don't get me wrong I do a good enough job and I adore my children - they argue a lot and they expect a lot though and it can be hard. (3 is war someone once told me!) I'm lucky my husband is wonderful and he has got more wonderful as he's learnt to live with the ups and downs of chronic illness. I have improved a lot in my health over the last 8 months and the more I improve the more I feel the Old me returning and the more I want my independence. I feel like I am waking up from a coma. My children are growing up now though - the boys are teenagers. Still I think one of the hardest things - if not the hardest thing about having debilitating health problems is also being there for other people. I've become very much a loner - especially since the arthritis kicked in nearly 5 years ago (unbelievably!) Our children are so precious though. They are like little gems that we want to keep safe and treasured forever. But they are people too - lol obviously haha - just that is what makes it so hard. <3