We live in a remarkable world, there is a frantic pace of progress in so many spheres. Areas such as technology, medicine, agriculture, military and primarily in information. Progress is exponential, this means the rate of progress is accelerating.
Traditional structures are under threat due to the increasing flux that our society finds itself in. Gone are the days when a person can hope to work for a single company their entire careers, then to retire to a good pension to live out the rest of their lives. As the corporates say, if you want loyalty, get a dog.
I started my career thinking the traditional way but in order to survive I have had to employ other skills.
So there is a strong drive for the individual to adapt in order to survive. Skills required must include being able to rise to changing circumstances, abilities must have a great deal of entrepreneurial skills and the ability to be independent. Schooling from what I have seen in South Africa, still aims the student towards obtaining further tertiary education at institutions like universities. This is a great shame as here there will be “too many Chiefs and not enough Indians”, somebody has to do the work, not everyone can sit in the administration office.
So how does one self – improve?
In the past, when people have had job security, self-improvement was largely set by goals made in terms of New Year Resolutions. Goals would be things like, “I have to lose ten pounds (modern equivalent would be 5 kilograms); I have to stop smoking; I have to get fitter; I want to read the classic “les miserables”, I must fix that leaking gutter, and so on…
When I was younger, in my teens and twenties, I used to faithfully set pages of goals for myself. Well, you know the story, great start but as time goes by the goals are neglected and forgotten one by one. Eventually I decided to forgo the route of recording my goals at the start of each year and avoid frustration. I smile now when I see some of my girls intently setting goals in their journals, breaking them down into measurable portions, using highlighters, and fancy dividers. So much energy! With tongue in cheek, but semi-seriously, I enquire to their progress. Just like me when I was younger, the goals and system maintenance of the detailed records lapses. But they do seem to be sticking to keeping going far better than I did. As they persist habits start to grow. Good for them, I hope they don’t give up. The youngest keeps her goals private and does not like to share them. My second oldest girl just loves showing me all her fancy programs of keeping records of daily activities.
So what do I do now? Have I just given up goal setting all together?
Nope, I haven’t given up. I have learned to adapt to my tendency of leaning towards disorganisation and chaos by using external factors. For example, to maintain my fitness, I used to play squash with some buddies who were keen. Their keenness to play resulted in nagging which would get me off my rear end onto a squash court. Nowadays I attend an aqua aerobics class for three times a week. The camaraderie of the fellow “splashers” and the encouragement of our instructor keeps me going.
I was never able to attend full time university as the cost was outside my family’s financial capabilities. I paid for myself to get a degree through UNISA, a correspondence university. I found a few folks who we could form a study group together and we would motivate each other to complete the necessary assignments and studying in order to pass the exams at the end of the year.
I also have a beautiful wife who is magnificent in encouraging me (tirelessly) to continue with various studies even when I am lazy or discouraged. I know that in today’s world it is vital to continue improving. To try new things out, and then to persist.
After my surviving some interesting health challenges and all the side effects of various medications, I put on some weight, and as I mentioned in my previous article, I have gone on a “diet”. So each week my weight is recorded and my wife does it with me too. I am losing weight but the loss has decelerated. I had a good laugh because 
Now goal setting and self-improvement are not necessarily about doing tough things all the time. An unusual goal that I recently set was to complete my puzzle. I set myself a daily target of doing about 50 pieces a day. May not seem too severe a goal but that is not taking my cats into account. They own my soul and they love to flaunt their cruel power over me. When I am building, both Nancy and Stormy love coming and plonking themselves exactly where I am focussing my attention. They don’t merely sit but love stretching out and rolling themselves. I dare not pick them up because that will offend them. So I move to the other table (after showering the tyrants with affection and scratching gently and stroking) to find other pieces that may fit into the puzzle. They are puzzled why I stopped my devoted ministrations to them after they allow me the great privilege of loving them, and slowly slink off to find another devotee. I have taken a picture to show you of my steady progress.
Some folks set goals to travel. How fantastic to see their goals achieved and their photos shared on this site. I think there are very few who can just travel; planning and much saving is required before these adventures can be undertaken.
Now I am a parent. My wife and I want the best for our girls. It is important for us the parents not to live our lives through the accomplishments of our kids. After all it is their life, not ours. But we do want to give them opportunities that we never had. We want them to improve themselves but the primary effort needs to be their effort, not ours. Encouragement not compulsion. Not to overload them. But to give them chance to stretch themselves. They have been sent to good schools and an even better university. Girl Brownies, piano, sports, cultural activities and a key focus on academic performance are opportunities that they were/are given. We had to carefully monitor the level of activities that were being done to ensure that they had time to be kids as well. And of course each person is completely different in terms of capacities and abilities. But I think we (and by that I mean my wife in particular) have done a pretty good job to raise balanced individuals who can improve themselves in the future. Sounds easy but not! We parents have had to (and still have to) wonder if we have done as well as we could. How could we have done better? Have we messed up our kids? Can they take self-improvement to the next level? Continual doubt and wondering is the lot of an anxious parent.
I love FINISHERS. I love finishing things. NOT to give up when the going gets tough. I look at the elite sportsmen and sportswomen on television and sometimes the program shares the years of sacrifice that these people have made. Not only talent but hard work accompanied by serious self-improvement with setting goals, measuring, reporting and analysis from self and highly professional coaches.
To me a great benefit from self-improvement is the reduction of stress. It is usually like managing the clearing of debts. Where does one start? I asked my wife and she said, “start with the baby that’s crying the loudest.” I like that. Yes, I know that planning is vital but it is better to start doing something rather than nothing. The best self-improvers (if there is such a word) are those who start with the most uncomfortable things. I will never forget what I heard Nancy Dornan say the one time, “I have learned to be comfortable in being uncomfortable”. If you ever get a chance, go and study the lives of Jim and Nancy Dornan. Remarkable people who created hundreds of millionaires. Their initial driving force was to generate “big money” to look after their baby who had spina bifada.
There are benefits for self improvement, maybe money, sports skills, musical skills. But the greatest benefits are self belief and satisfaction with one’s self.