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I met you in a place unexpected...I just saw you...in a time too rare...I saw you just across the streets then you stop...You stop right infront of me. And say "hello...how are you?" I greeted back "hi! am good". You step down from your bike a talk to me for a while. you appeared in an awkward way...you were with someone else...maybe your someone special after me...
Then I realized...how dare you, ask me "how are you?"
You don't even have the right to say the word hello...what more about the word "how are you?" Why you need to ask me the sweet word where in fact you were that one that cause me...AM NOT GOOD!
<center>WANNA SHOUT THE WHOLE WORLD...I AM NOT GOOD! God forbids I will never be good...</center>
I saw you smile...I saw you very happy now...at my expense!!!
God, at my expense...how can I be feel better seeing you with someone else...Happy with someone else. The fact that you just moved away without any words not even goodbye.
Then you appear and say hello! what an insensitive you are...!
and I hated you for that...or did I really hate you?
I hated myself for loving a fool like you...
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I went home and cry...a tears of pain that I can't endure seeing you happy with someone else...I should be the reason of the happiness you felt but I knew I am not..I am wounded with the spear you just created seeing you with someone else.So I need to pour out the pain...
It's raining outside and I am crying too. I want the tears to go with the rain outside...The rain will soon stop after pouring all the condensed vapor it accumulated..but the question is, when will this tears end. I have been crying for years now. Years passed since I saw you smile with a reason of me...and now when I saw you smile I feel he pain because I knew it wasn't me the reason anymore...it's someone else you tag along with you.
You just asked me...will I see you again? Oh my God...you are ridiculous! do you exactly know what you mean? or you are deemed liar...or user...whatever I may call you...yes, just to hide the pain!
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Just like the good old days...my world in turmoil again just because I saw you again...just because you smiled with different reason!
am I still inlove with you...the question that my heart answered differ from my mind.
I don't love you anymore...I will never love you again...so to speak behind my heart.
so long my dear...till we meet again...hope God will forbid!
PERSONAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENT:
Thank you mam @beanz for the support you always give to me...forever it will be cherish and may the good Lord will just return in thousand-fold...keep my prayers for you and your family.
@surpassinggoogle you are on great believer of the word life...and whatever you are going through now...keep my prayers.
Photos from pixabay
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