When Julian Assange shot to extra-ordinary fame after he was holed up at the Ecuador embassy in London, I thought to myself: hang on, does this mean the man gets white crisp sheets every night. His bed gets done pretty much whenever he wants it made, coffee sachets lined up on beautiful China clay, smell of clean floors and kitchen tops.
His acquaintances are trades men and cleaners who walk in to bring in perfect order and harmony in his life. Limited conversations and perfectly controlled temperature, how very blissful I thought again.
The best part: he gets a lot of time to himself - read anything, listen to any music, smash his avos on toast and drop honey or tobasco over it. It bloody doesn't matter. You can turn on that Al Jazeera and chuckle at rocket man Kim Jong Un, as if its your best friend on TV. I was convinced that being alone is not all that bad. I secretly envied his lifestyle and those little privileges he may have had.
It's true when people say 'be careful what you wish for, it might just come true'. I'm no Assange and I'm not in captivity. But a long ordeal with family law has left me holed up in a serviced apartment for over two years now. I cannot complain about white crisp sheets and all the never ending coffee sachets and towels washed and pressed for you to just pull out of cupboards and be used.
But living alone, in this little unit, has given me an idea for the first time on what it feels like to be on your own. I've always hopped from one relationship to another. But last two years, I chose to be on my own. You got to agree that this is probably the most perfect time to live alone in the history of mankind -- in the last few years, we were introduced to Uber, Airbnb, Tinder, Menulog, Crypto Currency and oh ye, even Steemit. No more shared responsibilities. Just pay as you go!
I keep wondering to what extent our idea of relationship is modelled by technological advancements in society. If almost 50 per cent of marriages are ending up in divorce, to what extent does tech changes impact human relationships in our times. Marriages have been failing over the last few decades and it's not a new phenomenon. But how we order our lives after a break up is heavily being influenced by tech. If bread and pill have liberated women in the 19th century, steemit/facebook, Uber, airbnb and menulog (and its competitors) ought to have some major impact on our lives, more than what's obvious to us.
What's obvious is that it's all "easier" now, easier than hunting and gathering too. Uber is cheaper than taxi, it's easy to stay connected to the world through Facebook, Airbnb has made it easier and cheaper for us to travel, online shopping is instilling more confidence, etc. But what are the social implications of this change?
My envy of Julain Assange's life in the Ecuador Embassy in London is not symptomatic of my mind alone. It's an uneasiness prevalent in many minds, an uneasiness to break free from the shackles of entanglements that were once designed for medieval times. This is more clear when you talk to people in relationships. Values that don't hold good anymore. Tinder, Airbnb, Steemit are axing chains around us. Completely destroying repressive ideas of family and human bonding.
Lot of my acquaintances -- online and offline -- from recent times I confess are with people who have found peace living alone. There's no remorse or regrets. Just a sense of gratitude that they have found themselves.
Then what has changed recently? Surely being alone and attaining Nirvana is not a new idea of living. Buddha walked out of his kingdom to meditate and find nirvana. Although he had a bunch of boys and a girl to hang out with, Jesus lived and died a single man. Gandhi may have lived in an Ashram most of his political life, but he always claimed that he was alone and he Assange, holed up in the embassy, has surely found himself. Whether you are in captivity or on the cross or under the tree working towards achieving Nirvana, the spirit of being alone just got reinforced with technology and it's time to celebrate this feeling.
In conclusion, let me tell you what I did to celebrate my time alone today. After a long exhausting day at a meeting with my business partner, I got back, chucked a piece of steak in the sync to thaw, drove down to the local wine shop, got a bottle of shiraz aged in whiskey barrels, came back, lit an Aldy perfumed candle and switched on Pink Floyd (listening to Dogs now). Message bubbles on my phone and discord flicker like fire flies. There's no better time to be single.. Embrace it and be at peace with yourself!
And when you loose control, you'll reap the harvest you have sown
And as the fear grows, the bad blood slows and turns to stone
And it's too late to lose the weight you used to need to throw around
So have a good drown, as you go down, all alone
Dragged down by the stone
-- DOGS by Pink Floyd