For the most part all of us insert ourselves mentally somewhere on the social/vocational totem pole. And for the most part all of us have this problem with judging people, we will write or talk about how dysfunctional it is, yet it still seems to continue.
Think about it? It happens at nearly every family gathering. With your co-workers, everyone is generally on the same page that it's not healthy or helpful...We should probably do something about it...most of us lack the internal belief system that we can do anything about it...
So, logically, we pull our social media feed and scroll, we allow our brain to go to some responsibility, or we look for our next dopamine hit...and the trends continue...
Then what?
People rarely change behavior's because they lack the skill or courage to shut down their distraction's and engage their brains. Your thought's establish your belief system which will also dictate your behavior...
Change Your Mind
Is it that easy? Try it!!! My kids try and tell me they can't...the same way they tell me 'I couldn't find my shoes...'
I have been practicing this with my children when they tell me they can't do something. I respond with, 'who told you that?'...turns out their brain did...then I tell them 'change your mind then'.
And just like that, they can find their shoes, they do remember what Mom asked them to do, they can clean their rooms etc...
The challenge with adults is we have experience that confirms the things we do. I am no good, this is where I fit in at work, these are the people I associate with etc.
What if you changed your mind?
What if you put the work in to put your distractions down, and address the way you think...your brain can actually change, ushering in an upgrade to your behavior...
A few tips
Next time you have an hour of free time, grab a journal and write down whatever degrading thoughts enter your brain, look at them. Make a choice to reject them.
Spend the first and last 10 minutes of everyday, in stillness, clear out negative thought and replace it with what you want to think about.
Schedule 60 seconds everyday to focus on smiling while speaking out the things you are thankful for. It's like a bath for your brain.
Greatness is a choice friends...your brain will dictate your behavior, change it if you need too...