Congratulations!!! You made it to summer break! And now you're looking for something to do or maybe even something good to binge watch on Netflix. Maybe you've decided that you want to watch 13 Reasons Why. If so, you've come to the right place. Here are 5 things you NEED to DO for yourself BEFORE you watch this series:
1 Speak with an adult about it
Speak with an adult 1st...preferably, one who has watched the series themselves. I really want to say, "get permission from a parent or guardian who has watched the series and who loves and protects you" but hey who are we kidding here, that is very unlikely to happen, but please hear me when I say to have a parent or guardian watch it before you and with you. I have had teens and parents express to me that the series made them experience intense emotions and feelings of depression. I have also had people share that they found the more graphic scenes very disturbing and even became nauseated while watching them.
This is not to belittle your transition into adulthood. It is to protect you mentally and emotionally. As a life coach who works with adults and teens, trust me when I tell you that needing emotional and mental support doesn't go away with becoming an adult. It is all a part of the experience of life and is nothing to be ashamed of. We all have and experience thoughts and emotions. That said, let us [concerned adults, caring professionals] help you protect your thoughts and emotions as you dive into this controversial, graphic, and thought provoking series.
2 Understand what 13 Reasons Why is NOT
This series is NOT for young children, preteens, or even the faint at heart... or those of us with weaker stomachs. It was not a series created just for your viewing pleasure. It was created to tell the raw ugly truth about the darkest recesses of the human mind in an effort to bring much-needed attention to what teens experience at the hands of each other and the people around them.
It is NOT one of those stories that all loose ends are tied up with a happy ending if you need a happy ending, 13 Reasons Why is not for you.
It is NOT a show you should watch alone. Please watch it with a responsible adult or guardian and maybe a few carefully chosen friends.
It is NOT a documentary. It is fiction! Remember that as you're watching the series. You may find that you will hate some characters and grow connected to others. As you grow connected to the characters you may find it tough to see them suffer in the manner that is depicted in this series, especially when there is no happy ending. Sadly, these events have happened and do happen to people all around us but this particular story is fiction.
3 Establish an emotional baseline
Be aware of your state of mind before you start an episode. Notice how you feel physically and emotionally. Use this as your baseline to determine how the show is affecting you.
Please note, if you or someone you love has been through similar circumstances; this series is packed with triggers! If you have had suicidal thoughts, if you have ever been physically, mentally, emotionally, or sexually abused, or suffer from being bullied, please be sure to to protect your emotional and mental well-being and avoid this series due to it's numerous triggers, graphic nature, rape, violence, drug and alcohol abuse, and suicide.
4 Schedule when you will watch each episode
I would caution against binge-watching this series. Instead, I would suggest that you carefully plan to watch only one or two episodes at a time. I would also encourage you to avoid watching an episode when you are already feeling down. Also, if you become overwhelmed while watching, take a break, give yourself the space to recover emotionally and mentally.
5 Choose your buffers
Have you ever seen weirdos sniffing coffee beans at the counter in the fragrance section of the mall? Well, if you smell several different perfumes they all start to smell the same or the smells can overwhelm you and begin to make you feel ill. This is Olfactory Fatigue. Sniffing coffee beans helps to cleanse your nasal palate so you can start afresh. Similarly, binge-watching or even just watching this series could contribute to Emotional Fatigue I would encourage you to do something light-hearted and fun or watch comedy shows in between episodes as an emotional buffer.
If you do choose to watch the series, it is my earnest hope that it will help to facilitate healthy dialog about the life issues that are addressed in the series. As a life coach who focuses on emotional fatigue in teens, I teach the 6 Pillars of Abundant Self-respect in the acronym B.E. E.P.I.C. These pillars are to uphold a high standard of grace in how you treat yourself and how you treat others. The 6 Pillars are:
6 Pillars of Abundant Self-respect:
Be yourself-Everyone else is taken
Experience your emotions-Express yourself
Embrace failure-It is success in progress
Pause for play-Your brain needs breaks
Incorporate your flaws-They are your superpower
Cancel all comparisons-Your data is incomplete
As you watch the series, I hope that you will keep the 6 Pillars of Abundant Self-respect in mind and consider how it would have made things different for the characters in 13 Reasons Why. More importantly, consider how these pillars could help you and your peers. If you want to know more please join and follow the BE EPIC Culture Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/BeEpicCulture/