I'm currently having one of those bad days that hit unexpectedly. I'm down with the flu, which I shouldn't be so surprised about given that I hardly sleep. So I guess my immune system will be down for a few days, and I most certainly will have to take a break. I have 2-3 posts on my note pad which I would try to complete so my blog remains active whilst I recuperate. And guys, take care of yourself. All the coins you're stacking wouldn't be worth anything if you do not have good health. I think it's high time I manage my time and activities better. I can do better if I'm more conscious about my time.
That aside I want to briefly talk about creativity today. It's been ages since I last posted a poem. I don't know, but I feel some type of way about it--earning for posting a couple of lines, no matter how meaningful they are. I'm still stuck in that mindset that 'more is better'. If I'm going post anything it should be at least 300words and I really don't write lengthy poems.
Writing stories is another thing entirely. Aside from the fact that I feel there is little demand for that on the steem ecosystem, writing a story is a more challenging task and I really don't like being mechanically about it. If there is no inspiration then I don't write and if I try I end up hating the piece. Even being inspired isn't good enough because I have to critic my own work which is a very difficult process because I'm what you might call a fault-finder. I might edit a piece today and to me it's great but the next day I'm canceling lines and turning the whole thing upside down.
I would say the most important reason for taking a break from creative writing is the fact I have decided that 2019 will be my year of grinding. There is a lot I need to put in place in other for me to have the luxury of being creative. Maybe 2020 will be the year I publish my poetry book. I have a ton of badly written poems I need to edit. Even if I don't write a book I probably will drop a poetry album, something similar to what Amir Sulaiman, Shihan, Black Ice used to do back in the day--good old days. I remind downloading all the episodes of def poetry on YouTube and watching them repeatedly. There were some life-changing moments just listening to people use words in a surreal ways. All these guys are nowhere to be found again and it really hurts you know. I did not fall in love with poetry by reading Shakespeare-- never really liked his work. Being a radical you would understand why I'm not a fan of lines and meters and a language that's weird for someone like to appreciate. Yes, you need to understand the basics but my fascination with being free creatively will never let me stick to those rules. Being a creative artist is about being in tune with one's inner self, that the source of all creativity, not man-made rules and patterns. My first true encounter with poetry was around 2009, reading the Bible. I love the book of Proverbs. Solomon had his way with words and I tried replicating his style on my notepad. I was just a 16 year old trying to sound smart
When will I be creatively free and available again?
I can't say for sure. My creative taste is in constant flux. First, I fell in love with poetry, then I tried story writing. However, ever since I started vlogging I've sort of developed a keen interest for videography. I still plan on getting a camera and going for some kind of training to understand the art of making a video--not the silly thing I do on dtube. I think the curators have been too nice to me because asides content my videos aren't anything to write home about. And in the further, I plan to do documentaries--some form of journalism. I have an inquisitive mind and I would really love to capture and explore different people, cultures, and place, and document my experiences and that of the people I come across. There are stories everywhere waiting to be told, I want to tell them. This for me is just an extension of my creativity--telling stories but this time with a camera. And I would definitely make out time to write my own stories. You know I'm just beaming with ideas I wish I could execute at this point but I would just have to get my life back on track first.
I feel awful at this point so I have to stop here and probably get some sleep. Bye guys.
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