Last night I had sex with a girl I met on tinder. It wasn't a surprise before going over that we were going to have sex because she confided in me that there was a 99% chance of a sexual encounter if I went over immediately. I failed my econometrics class but if there was thing I learnt, it was that a 99% chance of having sex is good. So I finished my most immediate activities and did what any sensible twenties something would do and panicked.
On my way to her place I developed high expectations of what was about to occur as she had told me that she was 'submissive' and liked it 'extremely rough', which is inline with my views on sex. She also told me I could tie her up and put it anywhere I wanted and even though I probably wasn't going to do that, it eluded to her willingness to do things.
When I got to her place she was in the middle of writing an essay and so I was left to linger aimlessly and awkwardly in her apartment. I could tell from her tinder profile and her apartment that she was a high achiever and whose enthusiasm was probably repressed during adolescence for high school grades but was having a resurgence in a highly sexual 20 (something) year old who only did things to extreme degrees. Her apartment was messy, cluttered with classical musical instruments and photos of her achieving achievements. I was pretty nervous, as I usually am in these circumstances, however I was extremely excited that I was about to have sex and also a little bit guilty of the debauchery that was about to transpire. She was equally odd in her own way which was alright because it rendered the awkwardness somewhat mutual.
There was a long interluding period while I waited for her to finish what she was doing on the computer that allowed me to get a sense of what it must have been like to be a concubine of antiquity, waiting patiently to be called upon by their master for their sexual pleasure. I could sense from her temperament that sporadic sexual encounters with strangers was regular part of her lifestyle and she even that she even probably had a designated time slot in her schedule to do such things. This didn't deter me and I didn't mind if I was guy #3 for the week.
Despite my trying, there was a severe lack of ice-breaking conversation to dull the tension and ease the nerves before commencing naughty activities. I must have arrived early because I was watching random shows on her tv for 20 minutes before she finally came over and joined me.
I guess at this point she figured it might be a good idea to have a civil prelude to the ensuing debauchery so she put some English comedy shows on that she liked and lay across my lap as to present her ass neatly to me. Her ass was good and it was fun to touch. The foreplay was also exciting and drawn out as we watched her favourite rude English comedy. Our intimacy levels escalated and soon her underwear was off and not long after my underwear was off too. Without going into graphic detail the sexual encounter I had fantasied about was playing out in reality as she allowed herself to be a canvas open for me to fulfil my sexual desires.
We progressed from the couch to the bedroom without interruption in the action and had been going for about 20 minutes. By now it was time for me to wrap things up and put a climatic ending (anywhere I wanted) to our fun activities so we could lie down exhaustedly and reminisce on a job well done. However as has been the unfortunate and extremely embarrassing case before, I was having trouble putting the finishing touches on our sexual indulgence despite being oh so close. Not wanting to end on a sour note, I went into overdrive as there was light at the end of the tunnel however I don't know if it was the marks on her back and butt from previous sexual encounters or the fact that there was no emotional connection between us but in the process I physically exhausted myself before being able to finish.
After this point things became pretty awkward. I apologised for the anti-climatic ending however she bluntly replied that it wasn't her loss. I was happy to relax for a while and would have been ready to go again in a few minutes, however I could tell from her unsatisfied demeanour and scrolling through Instagram that this probably wasn't going to happen. I think she wanted to relax too, but the feelings of reality that she used sexual encounters with random guys to avoid was creeping in. I asked if I should leave and although I think she wanted to say no, she said yes. I don't know exactly why, but at this point I had a sudden wash of guilt come over me, as though I had aided in her dejection by being an accomplice to her poor life decisions. I exclaimed that I didn't want her to think that I was using her however this had the opposite effect and only intensified an already tense moment. I left and we never contacted each other again, however I learnt a valuable lesson and that's that I need at least a 10% to 20% emotional connection to truly enjoy sex.