I'm having a blast reading and listening to all the awesome entries for the Tin Foil Raps - Paranoid Rhymes Contest!
I sincerely hope you're enjoying the challenge too!
I've decided to have a go at it with my own offering.
This is just for fun, and in case anyone is wondering I'm not eligible to win any of the prizes ;)
Here we go...
Pizza Related
He’ll be here in the early morrows
Make sure the plan is thoroughs
Or you’ll be drowning in your sorrows
The Cabal has changed the game
No matter, the results will be the same
We control the frame
They just need someone to blame
Name and shame
It’s that damn alt-right
Their fault, right? Something’s not right
It’s not just the all-white
It ain’t over yet, I still got fight
Pizza related
Time to run a Brownstone
Low light camera in a town home
Invite Hastert, Podesta, Alefantis and the whole gang
Let’s watch complicated films in Tony’s basement, have a gang-bang
Should I play dominoes on cheese or on pasta?
I mean, a Haitian boy or a lil’ rasta
I must wait for the K street mobstas
Who helped me get elected with my partnas
Oh look, there’s Uncle Joe up on C-Span
Making moves with his creep hand
Stroking kids right on camera
Where does he get the stamina?
Adrenaline flows from fear
Feeding dark entities that appear
Conjured by an Abramovich brew
Biden and Obama too
65,000 dollar hotdogs flown in from Chicago
After party at Mara Lago
These fools buy this partisan sideshow
Shit, I just got another 16 million from Morocco
Another 25 mil from the House of Saud
Make it rain, I feel like a fucking God
At home or abroad
A well-organized fraud,
We must remove Assad!
Says stenographer Chuck Todd
Ship em’ all the arms they need
There’s no limit to my greed
Goldman Sachs speaking fees a breeze
And Bill’s getting upwards of 200 Gees
All aboard this gravy train
Every week Lolitta express aero-plane
Jet setting south to Lil Saint James
Sadomasochistic whips and chains
But, not before we get fast and loose
Worked over by a 15-year-old masseuse
Let’s run a caboose of perfuse
Mena coke induced abuse
Nothing Like partying with Eps
Spacey, Prince Andrew and state reps
Dershowitz high fiving Chris Tucker
You one bad mother fucker
Off to Haiti for fresh hearts
Mining contracts, sweatshops and body parts
Global Initiative flowing revenue charts
A rape and pillage charity is a true art.
Pizza related
Back in DC we got a leaker or a mole
Know your role
Pod father’s in complete control
Be certain heads will roll
Stay ready
Summon DNC Debbie
She already owes me plenty
It’s about to get hot and heavy
By the way, send this painting to John, I think he’d like it
Tony has the same one, I think he’s psychic
Debbie’s here to see you, Mam, what’s the pitch
It’s that snitch, Seth Rich, we need to ditch
Use MS-13 kids, that don’t flinch or twitch
The kind we can unhitch and shit
Make sure he dies in slow-mo
DC metro body cams are a no-no
Pod says make an example out of him like a promo
A fresh john doe, set your chronos
In the meantime, sacrifice a chicken in the yard to Moloch
On the low with no talk
Call the doc, I’m good to go for the Botox
I gotta look good for these war hawks
Oh, and tell David Brock
To put a sock, in the Guy Fawkes internet squawk
I want it on lock,
Prepare the Black Block and Media Ops
Correct the Record, ban that reddit sub
We’ll shut it all down from twitter to github
Order Alex Jones to act like a nutjob on Rogan
We’ll conduct a false flag at Comet and make up a slogan
“Stand with Comet”
Don’t make me vomit!
You can do better than that to calm it.
James is out of the closet, use Anti-Gay comments
Got it?!
Pizza related
Let’s get Snopes and Google to Fact-check
Debunked! Nope! It’s all fake, where’s my fat cheque?
The talking point will be “Fake News”
Be extra cautious never to wake fools
Get David Seaman to cater to the young on Youtubes
Focus the narrative on himself with some screws loose
Repeat how corporate media would never utter lies
Trust the legacy muppets and monarch butterflies
Did I stu-stu-studder mother fucker?
Fill up their minds with clutter, make them shudder
Get those minions back in their places, sleepwalking
Label dissenters as “conspiracy theorists” talking
At the same time start the gang stalking
Get them infighting pointing fingers and doxxin’
Hold please, I have a call on the other line
Hello Huma, Yes, I’m doing fine
Except for this leaker landmine
Tell me, what’s the latest headline?
I see, make another Comet Pizza booking
I’m in some desperate need of a spirit cooking
Before I lose my footing
Is there something I’m overlooking?
Need to cut my left middle finger open and eat the pain
Again and again, eat the pain
That’ll make it rain
So, I can stake my claim
As the first Whitehouse Dame,
Popping champagne
What’s that again?
Blast! Wikileaks has my details
Gonna kill the one who leaked my fucking emails
Run the story of how Assange is a rapist!
Make it go viral like Kanye West and Gay-Fish
Can’t we drone him into the stone ages?!
Since when does Ecuador read off-script pages
Damn this will be a close shave
The campaign can I still save?
I’ve had enough today, get me my favorite sex slave
When I’m done send her to meet Vince Foster in a cold grave
Pizza related
It's Pizza related…
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