Wow! that was an amazing trip!
I tried DMT in guatemala 2 years ago and I can also say its not something you should take for fun. Its a tool to conect this reality with other realities.
My trip was shorter. To explain it in a few words was basically as follows:
I gave 2 or 3 pust, I cant remember. I was liying down on a bed and the sealing became organic and started moving like waves, next thing some color lights were born all around. On that moment I closed my eyes and saw the same kind of kaleidoscope thing, I was going through that pretty fast for, I guess, a few seconds and then... I was there, in this other reality just laying down surrounded by tentables that grew towards the skye... Those tentacles had all the rainbow colors flowing upwords like energy flowing and they were dancing like algaes mover by the oceans waves. Im not sure if I could of moved but I didnt even try. I felt some precenses some distance from me on the left and a bigger and closer presence next to me on the right. I didnt look but I got the message this closer being was sending to me... it was simple and clear "you are not ready, go back"
And that was it, I was back on my bed...
I sware that was real! I stil believe this life, this world, this reality is just a classroom. we are here to have a human experience and learn something and then we "wake up" there, where we are something so much bigger...
I do wanna do it again but I feel I need to be ready so... not sure when I would do it... Maybe I just wait until I die and go there... :)

PS: sorry if I wrote something wrong... English is my second language ;)
PS2: I'm happy you got the curie! this is a great post but I wouldn't call it comedy at all! this is spiritual and lifechanging... thanks!