Getting Started
It started innocently enough. I wanted a change of scenery and a new life. I have been married and divorced twice. My first marriage lasted 3 years and my second marriage was for 11 years. After my second divorce I had moved from Vancouver, Canada back to the U.S. Life on the North East Coast of the U.S. was getting to me. The weather was extreme with brutally cold winters that were followed by boiling hot summers with a short break in between for Spring. I had enough but I had no idea about where I wanted to go. I was thinking about moving to the D.R. I heard wild tales and rumors about the place for years. Since I had no idea what to expect I decided I would make some contacts and get some insider info on the country. I had no idea where to start and I got started by cruising YouTube for info on the DR.
A few vloggers said that Dominican Cupid was a great service for meeting local women. I thought why not give it a try. I could connect with a local woman and I could learn more about the country, its people and culture Dominican Cupid is an online dating website and app that is one of many dating websites owned by Cupid Media Ltd. The website is loaded with profiles of beautiful single women looking for single men.
I browsed the profiles and come across Anya. Anya is an attractive and exotic looking woman, with a sexy and curvy figure. She is a single mother of three teenage children. She is lives in Santo Domingo with her children. I contacted her through the Dominican Cupid app. I signed up for just one month on a trial run of the service. I had a strategy in mind. I would move our conversation over to Whats app. Whats App is free and easy to use. We would be able to stay in contact even if I decided to cancel my Dominican Cupid membership. In the long run this was basically a bad idea.
I ask her to tell me more about herself. She says she is a hair stylist and she wants to own her own hair salon. She has been separated for two years. She says what about you? I tell her I am single and that I have two children, a girl and a boy. The children do not live with me since my divorce. They live with their mother in Canada.
She asks what am I looking for in relationship? I tell her that I am looking for a caring and loving woman. She thinks this is great. She tells me she is looking for a caring man that is attentive and respects women. All normal and expected stuff really.
I send her a few pictures of me while I am on vacation in Walt Disney World. She sends a few back to me. I become more attracted and interested in her after seeing her other pictures.
As time goes on I become comfortable talking with her. Things take a weird turn when I start discussing my upcoming trip to the DR. I plan on flying roundtrip into Santo Domingo and after a few days in the capital I will head over to Sosua. Sosua is a popular beachside resort town on the northern coast of the Dominican Republic.
She sends me more videos of herself. They are a little more flirtatious and sexy than the first ones. I tell her how beautiful and hot she is. She really has my attention at this point. Then she gets this sort of passive aggressive and jealous attitude. I tell her I need to go bed early at one point on my Walt Disney World vacation because I am running a race at 6 am in the morning. She accuses me of not wanting to talk to her and because I am more interested in other women. Her accusations put me on the defensive. I feel somehow that I have fallen into some sort of psychological trap. She is controlling and manipulating me somehow.
I tell her that I want to talk her and that I am interested in her. Oh, she says I do not want to bother you. Now, she is guilt trips me. At this point I think what have I gotten myself into? Maybe this is the stereotypical Latin passion and drama coming to the surface. I had no idea what to expect at this point. Am I am just being a simp and playing Mr. Nice Guy while she is manipulating me?
At this point I am committed to booking my trip to the DR. I tell, Anya that I plan to be there by the following month. It is my first visit and I am open to suggestions. She throws me a curve ball. Hey why don’t I stay at a 5-star hotel in Punta Cana? She has a membership there and she can get me a discount. It would only be $250.00 a night at the Bavaro Palace. She always goes there for her birthday, and it is one of the best places on the island. The hotel also has a disco and pool only for adults. It is beautiful she says. She sends me pictures and videos of her at the hotel. She becomes very insistent about this. I can stay at her place for a few days then we head up to the Bavaro Palace resort.
She sends me more pictures and videos of her. At this stage I feel that things between are becoming more intense. I tell her she is very sexy, and that she makes me weak. Why are you so sexy, I say? My become more playful and more charming as I get more motivated to take my trip to the DR. Out of all the woman that I have met on the service, Anya stands out. She has a beautiful face and is full figured and curvy. She is my type woman.
Anya is really on my mind at this point. I think about her day and night. I tell her I want to see all of her. I meant something like a picture of her in a bikini or a swimsuit. A little something more revealing and sexy. I got more than I expected when she sent me a topless picture of her followed by a frontal pic of her vagina. I was shocked. I thought the topless picture was cute and sexy. I had never been sexted before and, it was amazing to see a beautiful topless woman on my phone. Yes, that was way cool. I thought the vagina pic was weird and it made me a little uncomfortable especially since I was at work at the time.
I thought, I could be on to something. My upcoming trip to the DR might be very exciting indeed. I told her that I was interested in her and I could not wait to see her. Then bam! She said I did not like her and that I was not interested in her. Bye, she said. That was that. She blocked me on Whats App and Dominican Cupid.
Anya’s rejection hit me hard and I was depressed. Then I become determined to find someone new. I obsessively went through the profiles on Dominican Cupid contacting women on the site. I found, Indira, she is slimmer and younger than, Anya, and she has a pretty face and a dark complexion. Indira chose me as one of her favorites on the site. Indira also had a tongue piercing. Yeah, a woman with a tongue piercing for some odd reason turns me on.
We connect, and we chat back and forth via text messages. We get to know each other better. Indira is open, friendly and inviting. She really inspires me to visit the DR. She even invites me to stay at her place while I am there. That sounds good to me, but hey there is a catch she says. She does not have a refrigerator. She wants to cook for me, but she needs a refrigerator first. She found a great one at a low price. It is only $10,0000.00 Dominican pesos, which is about $200.00 USD.
I tell her that I do not give money to people that I have only met online. Indira, then calls me and video chats me with me. She goes on and on about how feels something for me and that she is interested in me. She really wants us to be together. She asks me for money for a refrigerator again. She calls, texts video chats with me several times to ask for money. Her constant requests for money become very aggravating and annoying.
I do a little online research about this. DR is known for having one of the highest rates per capita of prostitution in the world. Prostitution is legal in the country and is commonplace. There are full time prostitutes that work in brothels, on the streets and independently. There are also prostitutes who are called semi-pros. Semi-pros are either students, full-time workers or professionals that engage in prostitution part-time as a means of income. A semi-pro may not want talk to openly about sex for money. They do not want to be thought of as prostitutes. They would rather be thought of as a woman that gets gifts and money from a boyfriend because he loves and cares for her. A sort of sex with benefits relationship.
Sex and companionship are traded for money and gifts. Indira’s offer of stay and play was the second one I had received so far. It was hard for me to understand what she meant. The semi-pros use euphemisms for their services. This type of relationship is called a “vacation girlfriend.”
As an example, man goes to the DR for a week and he meets up with his local or “vacation” girlfriend. He either stays with her or she stays with him at his hotel. He gives her money for her expenses/companionship and he may bring her gifts. He also takes her out to dinner, clubs, and goes shopping with her. The man may also support the woman and send her money by Western Union once or twice a month. Most of the women ask for about $50.00 per month. Women in the DR know that most foreign men can afford it and they will not be bothered by sending a small amount of money per month to their “vacation” girlfriends.
The “Western Union Papi” is considered a goldmine. There are stories of women having as many as 10 boyfriends sending them $50.00 per month. That is about $500.00 USD per month and $6000.00 USD per year. Considering that the average income in the DR is 1,298,132 Dominican Pesos or $31,041 and the average rent is $100-200.00 USD per this is a great windfall.
Some men even set up their vacation girlfriends in fully furnished apartments, paying the rent, and as well as sending them a monthly allowance. Add on top that the woman may have a “Chulo”, or Dominican boyfriend on the side. Her chulo may live with her when her foreign boyfriend is not around.
Alarm bells began ringing for me. Yeah, Indira, was attractive, interesting, talkative, a single mother but something was not right. She just would not let the money issue go.
I told her that I booked a reservation at a hotel instead of making plans to stay with her. She was getting cagey all around. I asked her how much It was for a taxi from Santo Domingo airport to her house. Oh, she had no idea she said. Then I told her please give me your address so that I can figure out the fare for myself. She would not give me the address and she just told me that she lived nearby a large hospital in San Andres. She wanted me to stay with her for a week, but she would not give me her address. I emailed Bambino Taxi in Santo Domingo and they had no clue what I was talking about. They had not heard of hospital in that area.
I got a quote of $30.00 from Bambino Taxi to go from the Santo Domingo airport to the Tau Casa Conde Hotel in the Zona Colonial section of downtown Santo Domingo. Indira said that was too much and she would contact a local taxi company. Well, she never did get that information for me. Instead she just kept asking me for money. She would say I am not getting enough hours at my job and I cannot pay my rent. “Could you help me?” I replied that she already knew that I was not sending money to someone I have never met in person.
She then pours it on. She wants to be my girlfriend, she loves me, she wants to be with me, but she needs money. She can’t get enough work and she has bills to pay. The calls and requests for money happen at least three times a day. I block contact her on Whats App and Dominican Cupid. At this point the constant requests were annoying and overwhelming. This is all leads me to believe that, Indira, is a professional con artist. There several ways that women from the DR scam men online. One is the mystery illness. A woman says she has a terrible illness and she sends a picture of her in the hospital with an IV in her arm. She became sick suddenly and she needs money immediately to pay for the necessary treatment. The picture is staged with in a fake hospital and with a fake IV.
As soon as I cut off contact with her, Indira pops up again. Using another name and profile to get in touch with me. She says she is sorry that she upset me by asking for money. She will not do it again. She loves me and needs me. She calls and video chats with me with tears in her eyes. Amor, she says, again and again she wants to put all these disagreements behind us. She just wants us to be together. It will be just be the two of us alone in San Andres. We will go to the beach, cook dinner together and get to know each other.
At this moment I give up on, Indira, and started talking to other women online. She starts up again with the requests for money. She has fallen behind on her rent and needs to get caught up otherwise she will have to move in with her mom. She does not want to ask but could I help her out somehow?
I politely refuse. A few days later a crisis happens. She is sick and needs medicine. It is only 2000-3000 ($40-60 USD) pesos for the medicine. She has the flu and she cannot afford the medication. She also calls me about 11 times by video chat to ask for this money. I tell her that I think she is a great person, but I have met another woman online. I wish her the best of luck and I know she will find the right man for her.
At this point I totally give up on her. It has been about a month of going back and forth with a lot of stories, lies and scamming for money. Unfortunately, Indira, is not the only woman using the website to scam for money. Generally, these women are very nice in the beginning and they sweet talk me. Maybe they even video chat with me. But always something comes up. They would love to talk to me, but they need money to top up their mobile phone account. Others say they need money for their internet bill, or it could be they need money for food, it goes on and on.
After dealing with scammer after scammer I find a few women that seem most interesting to me. One is, Elba. Well it takes me awhile for me to figure that she is a prostitute. It is difficult for me to understand since prostitution is legal in the DR why women on the dating website just do not say straight up front they are prostitutes looking for clients.
During my first conversation with Elba, she uses a euphemism, “Tell me what are you looking for in a woman? Someone to pass the time with or something else?”
I have no idea what something else would mean, so out of curiosity, I tell her, “I am looking for a woman to spend the night with me.” She tells me it is 4000 pesos for an hour. I get what she is talking about now. She sends me a topless picture of her and now it is crystal clear what she means. I am naïve but not clueless. I get it.
At this stage a light comes on for me. Beyond dating the website has another side to it. It is an escort service of sorts. Women post basic profiles with a few sexy pics and then they cruise the site looking for clients. They feel out men out by asking them a few leading questions, “What kind of woman are you looking for?” or “What are you looking for in a woman.” Then it goes on from there.
Well, I am a bit down at this point. I realize that most of the women on the site could be divided into two categories, scammers or escorts. Any of the compliments they give me or interest they show in me is fake. They are just hustling for clients.
I know I can find a nice and caring woman to be with. I am looking for friendship even possibly dating. I did not want to be seen as a sex tourist on prowl. I also did not want to become a Western Union simp. I wanted something real even if it was just a friendship.
Santo Domingo Adventure
I meet, Mayriela. She likes my profile and shows interest in me. We chat back and forth. She calls me for a video chat and I find out she is deaf. I am a bit shocked. We mostly communicate by text messaging. She said, she was married to an American man in Florida then they got divorced and she had to return to the DR. She wants to go back to the U.S. and she is looking for a good and caring man to be with.
Mayriela is intelligent and writes very well in English. As we talk more and more online I feel connected with her. Of all the women I have met so far, Mayriela, seems the most interesting and sincere. I am excited about meeting her. My flight into Santo Domingo arrives around midnight. Mayriela, says her friend, Randor, who is a taxi driver will pick me up at the airport and then take us to my hotel.
I ask her how much it will cost. She tells me $100.00. I know Bambino Taxi only charges $30.00 from the airport to my hotel, but she insists that her friend is not overcharging. First, he will pick her up in San Cristobal then go to the airport to pick me up. I foolishly go along with the plan.
When, I arrive in Santo Domingo I find Mariel at baggage claim. Something about her was off right from the start. Her profile said she was 6’ 1” tall and she really 5’ 2”. I will say she is a beautiful and fit woman though. I get my bags and we all go outside to Randor’s taxi. The taxi was not really a taxi but just Randor’s van.
Well, Randor, and his buddy were the worst taxi drivers ever. They got lost three times on the way to the hotel and had to stop several times to ask for directions. During the drive I ask, Mayriela, was the fare really $100.00. She shrugged her shoulders and said yes. Well it was around 1 am and I was not going to argue about it at this moment. I was too excited to being with, Mayriela.
Mayriela checks into the hotel with me. I give the front desk clerk my passport. He asks, Mayriela for her ID or passport and she says she did not bring one with her. I think how weird it is that she knew we were checking in the hotel together did she not bring her ID?
After we get into the hotel room, Mayriela, pulls her passport out of her bag. She shows me her expired US tourist visa. I thought okay here I go again another scammer and now I am alone in a room with her. Then Mayriela, gives me a list of demands. One. she wants me to sponsor her for a visa to visit the U.S., two she wants me to marry her, and three she wants me to send her $50.00 by Western Union every month. I was kind of freaked out at that moment and I thought this going to be a disaster. It is 1 am in the morning, and I just want to go sleep.
Before I left the U.S., she asked me to get her a few things. Bras, underwear, and Nike running shoes. She takes off her clothes and tries on her bras in front of me. I get my second wind. She has an amazing body. She is petite, yet busty and very fit. One second thought I think I will give this a chance.
We hook up, but it does not go well. Since I did not agree to any of her requests, Mayriela, becomes cold to me. After we have sex she goes her to side of the bed and just stays there. I felt she was expecting something, but I had no idea what it was.
I had a guided tour booked for the next morning. I booked the tour only for myself since I did not know if, Mayriela, would going to show up at the airport. At that moment I felt something was off between us. I told, Mayriela, before that I left for Santo Domingo that I would rather check into the hotel by myself. I would visit her in San Cristobal the next day. She insisted on coming to the hotel with me.
I talked with the tour guide and he thought it was best that I went on the tour by myself since, Mayriela, and I had just met. I did not feel comfortable with, Mayriela, being in the hotel room by herself. I had no idea what she and her friends had planned. I told, Mayriela, that I would go on the tour by myself and that she could go back to her house. I would meet up with her later. I asked her how much the taxi fare would be to her place. She said it was $100.00. I knew she was lying. I asked the tour guide over the phone how much the taxi fare would be from Santo Domingo to San Cristobal. He thought it would only be $25-30.00. I told, Mayriela, that I would ask at the hotel how much the fare would be.
When I got to the hotel the desk clerk said it would be about $30.00 at the most to go from Santo Domingo to San Cristobal. I asked him to call a taxi for Mayriela. She said to call, Randor, and that he could pick her up and take her back home. I did not want, Randor, or his friend to show up at the hotel. I have heard stories of scam artists shaking down tourists for money at hotels and causing a scene. They could claim I agreed pay them $100 to take Mayriela back to her house. I did not want to have any problems with the hotel or the police. I rushed, Mayriela, out of there. I had no idea what she had but in mind, and I did not want to take any chances this early in my trip.
She was shocked and angry. I was upset too. She lied to me twice. I felt if she was alone in my room she might have cleaned me out and all my stuff would be gone when I got back. I was not taking any chances. She was real upset with me and crying, but I was hurt that she was playing me for a fool and scamming me.
The tour guide had arrived at the hotel at this time. He sat on a couch near the front desk next to, Mayriela. While I went to the room to double check that she had left nothing behind, she told the tour guide I was cheap and did not give her anything.
She was just a semi-pro and looking for money. I fell for a semi-pro and it was then that I knew I had no clue what I was doing in this country. I already had a hunch that many of the women on the website were escorts. That reality really sunk in at this point. The previous night she became cold to me because I did not give her money for companionship and sex. “Propina” is what it is sometimes called.
It was all clear now. I understood that many women in the DR are looking for clients or “vacation boyfriends”. As I walked the streets of Zona Colonial it was obvious to me that sex tourism is a big business in this country. I walked past a beauty salon and a woman sitting in front of the salon asked me if I wanted a massage. I had seen videos about places like this online. but I thought it was just an urban legend. She walked me past women getting their hair done to a black lit massage room in the back of the salon. I was like OMG! I could not believe it. I said thanks but no thanks, and I kept on walking.
A beautiful woman in her 20’s that was hanging out on the street asked me if I wanted, “Campanera” or companionship for the night. She wanted to know what hotel where I was staying at. I told her the name of the hotel. She said she could go there with me. I told her maybe next time. She looked disappointed, and she was got pushy about going with me. I still politely refused. Then she went back to hanging out with the other women working the street.
I had a learned a bit from my experience with Mayriela. In the Dominican Republic when a woman comes to the room of man she has just met it may be all about the business of “Companera” or “Pay for Play” as it sometimes called. So where is the line drawn? I had no idea. I was confused. I knew that I should not assume every woman in the city was a semi-pro or prostitute. I was worried that all the women I contacted on Dominican Cupid would assume I was a “john,” a guy cruising the site looking for “pay for play.”
I was still in contact with other women on the site. I invited, Elisabeth, to meet me the next day. She is an attractive woman in her mid-20s with a busty and curvy figure. I thought she and I could sit down in the hotel restaurant and have a drink together. We could get to know each other. Elisabeth arrived at the hotel very nicely dressed and I was excited to see her. We went to the hotel restaurant to have a beer and chat. I had a tour scheduled later so we had a couple of hours to hang out.
Well, Elisabeth, knew how push all the right buttons and get me worked me up. She kissed me, caressed my leg, and said she wanted to get to know me. She wanted to come up to my room. We went up to my room and one thing lead to another. It was hour or so of us getting intimate. At this moment I had a clear idea what was going on. Was she a semi-pro? I offered her a “gift” of 2000 pesos, oh but she said look I need a manicure and my nail polish is coming off. I gave her another 1000 pesos. A least now I knew the score.
She never said was an escort or prostitute, and Elisabeth, was friendly and outgoing the whole time we were together, yet it was still business. I understood what was implied between us. Basically, it was “Yes, I will be with you and pretend to be your girlfriend, but I am doing it for money.” It was a business transaction not love. I got it. In the DR a foreign man is useful as a means of income. The “Amor” stuff and all the affection she put in her text messages were part of her sales pitch. I was okay with that. At least I knew my part. At this point I realized I could play the game and just have fun. I could not take anything she said seriously and I would just be one of her many clients.
The following day I took the Caribe Tours bus from the Santo Domingo to Sosua. It was a 3-hour trip. I wanted to check out Sosua and see what it was all about. I was on my way to meet, Kayra. We met through the site as well. I had been in contact with her before I came out to the Dominican Republic. She is in her mid-thirties and a single mother of three children. Her son is 18 and lives in Santo Domingo with his grandmother. She also has two teenage daughters that live with her in Sosua.
3 Days in Sosua
Kayra, and I meet at the Sosua bus station. She is beautiful, petite, and about 5’ 2’ or so. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her. I felt something for her instantly. I had a condo booked through AirBnb that was near the center of town.
The Super Bowl was happening that weekend. It is the busiest and most expensive time to go to Sosua. Loads of men from the U.S come to Sosua for a big party weekend. After I got checked into my the condo and put my stuff away. Kayra and I kissed then held each other. She called me her “Amor.” I am totally in love her at that moment.
She asks me if I am hungry and I told her yes. We walked to Baileys restaurant. a popular place in the center of town. The menu at Baileys is international and geared towards tourists. It has burgers, ribs, pizza and the like. It is also one of the most expensive places in town. Kayra, and I ordered Chinese chicken fried rice. The food was nothing too outstanding or different than other restaurants I have been to. I was too distracted by, Kayra, to pay much attention to my food anyways.
I also have to say I was distracted something else. When we entered the restaurant I noticed a few attractive women walk by and look directly at me. They quickly looked away when they saw I was with, Kayra. I knew Sosua’s reputation well. It was supposedly a single man’s paradise of sorts, with one of the highest concentrations of female prostitutes in the DR. I had a hunch what was going on.
I also saw a European man that was about 60-70 sitting at table with a young local woman that was about 20. It thought that was weird. I would later learn that this was commonplace in Sosua. Three women I saw walking around the restaurant earlier caught the attention of a group of African American men. I could easily tell by their clothes and their accents that they were from the states. Well my hunch was more of less confirmed that this was a pickup spot for prostitutes.
I brought my attention back to, Kayra, she told me she was sincere and looking for a good man that treated her well. She said she was single mom that was all alone and had to do everything by herself. She was mother and father to her children since the father of her children was murdered. She said her boyfriend was shot in the head and his body left by the side of road.
Kayra touched my heart and she seemed genuine and sincere. Inwardly I was holding myself back, yet I felt I could spend my whole life with her. She seemed perfect. After lunch we went back to my room. We picked up juice and few snacks on the way.
Kayra asked me to buy her two bottles of Givenchy Irresistible perfume before I left the U.S. She was very excited to get them. I found out that some Dominican women expect you to be their personals shopper. Mayriela, also gave me a shopping a list of things she wanted bras, running shoes, and underwear. With, Kayra, it was perfume. Other women even asked me for cell phones. I said a big no that though.
In the room, Kayra, and I were hanging out watching the Super Bowl. I also brought two bottles of Tito’s handmade vodka with me from the U.S. I told her it was way strong and to just take it easy. It was a warning that, Kayra did not fully understand.
We had screwdriver cocktails, and we watched the Super Bowl. My favorite team, the New England Patriots got wrecked early in the game and it was a done deal. With the game over and nothing else to do, Kayra, and I got ready to go to sleep. Well not really, Kayra, has an amazing tight and toned body. One thing lead to another and we are having sex.
The next day I am exhausted. Jet lag, the bus ride and sex take their toll on me. It is raining anyways so it was not a beach day. Kayra told me she had to go by her house to check in on her daughters as well as get a few things. We hop on a moto cocho together. I felt like a giant on the moto cocho. The two of us somehow squeeze on the back of the motorcycle behind the driver. It is almost impossible for me to stay on. I feel like I am going to fall off the back and die any second.
Moto cochos are something I have only seen in the DR. A moto cocho is a motorcycle taxi where the passenger hops on the back and the driver takes the passenger wherever they need to go. They are totally risky in so many ways. Usually neither the driver nor the passenger wear helmets. The drivers do a high speed game of jockeying for position with cars and trucks in traffic while you hold on for dear life. The experience is even more terrifying at night since Sosua has very few streetlights, potholes galore, no traffic lights and there are no designated traffic lanes. It is no wonder that the rate of traffic accidents and fatalities in the DR are very high.
Thank God It is only a five-minute moto cocho ride from the condo to her place. We make a stop at Kayra’s place and I meet her daughters. Then we hop on a moto cocho for the ride back to the condo. Once back at my spot she drops off her stuff and we head out again. We head over to the bar that Kayra works at, Our Roses. The Our Roses is a small place on Pedro Clisante street. Pedro Clisante street is known as the Party Strip in Sosua. It is where the Classicos nightclub other popular nightclubs and restaurants line up one after the other. It is where all action is.
It was a rainy day and there was not much to do. Kayra wanted to have a drink and chat with her friends and co-workers. Well, it started with one drink then went onto another and another. We started out with President light beers. I felt generous and picked up tab for Kayra’s friends and co-workers too. I foolishly wanted to impress, her.
This fun started in the early afternoon and kept going. I got lost in the conversation that, Kayra, was having with her co-workers and friends since my Spanish was just not good enough to keep up. We were planted here. Next door to the bar is a small restaurant so I could have something to eat while we were drinking. Kayra asked me for money, she could take a moto cocho to her house. I gave her 100 pesos since it was 50 pesos each way.
I met up with another, American, while I was hanging out at the bar. T. is a nice guy from the Midwest in his mid-40s that lives full time in Sosua. He was seated to next to an attractive Haitian woman that was about 25 or so. In my conversation with T., I learn a lot about what goes on in the DR.
For starters, T., had just picked this woman through a dating app called, Tagged. She just got off the bus from Haiti. The app let him know when she was nearby and hooked up. They had spend the past few days together. I told him I had used Dominican Cupid to meet women. He said, “Tagged” is better and is free. I told him about my $100 taxi ride from Santo Domingo airport to the Zona Colonial. He said that was one of the oldest tricks around. I felt so embarrassed for falling for it. He said another one was the mysterious illness that affects a woman’s mother or grandmother and they need money right away. He also told me that some women have a boyfriend, or “chulo” as well as foreign boyfriend. The “chulo” will encourage his girlfriend to have sex tourists and other men to bring in an income.
There are also the Western Union girls. These are women have foreign boyfriends that send them money every month by Western Union. These women work the streets of Sosua as prostitutes and meet foreign men. Sometimes a man falls in love with the prostitute. She tells him that she will happy to quit working on the street if he sends her money every month. Or the woman will say she is broke and she cannot pay her bills and she just needs a little money to get by, like $50.00 or so. Not a lot of money just enough to get by. That was all too familiar to me. He was confirming some things that I already knew.
T. says once a month you will see these women lined up at the Western Union office to get cash from their foreign boyfriends. I have a lot to think about. Kayra, knows, Tom. What kind of history have they had together? Kayra, says she has never been a prostitute, yet I know that the most common job for women in Sosua is prostitution. She tells me that she knows, Tom, because he is a regular customer at her bar. Can I really believe her?
I am thinking about all this while, Kayra, is gone. I am also getting wasted at this point too. I started off with beer and I was now onto Cuba Libres or rum and cokes. Kayra was going full tilt at this point. She had gone from beer, to whiskey, and then onto wine. It was now about 7 or 8 pm or so and getting dark.
Once, Kayra, was back she just wanted to drink more. Shots of tequila were followed by shots of a potent Dominican brew called, Mama juana. Mama juana is a mixture of wine, rum, and local herbs that steeps for a month or so. It is also rumored to be aphrodisiac. All the drinking gets, Kayra, in party mood. The music is turned up loud and few of us dance in front of the bar.
I keep telling, Kayra, that she needed to something to eat and that it was not good to drink on an empty stomach. She did not want food from the nearby restaurant. After the shots of mama juana we hopped on a moto cocho for a ride across town for some “sopa” or soup. Three people on a small motorcycle, two of them drunk and carrying hot soup. I just have no idea how we made it.
Well we get back to my room. Kayra had some of the soup. Then she was in the mood for sex, so we started out having sex on a chair, then in the bed. I was so drunk I forgot to put on a condom. We were “borracho’ or way drunk. It was another night of amazing sex and then we fall asleep.
That peace and quiet only lasted a few minutes and because a storm was brewing. Kayra said she felt sick and had to go to the bathroom. At this moment the storm came on full at full force. What followed was a night of Kayra going in and out of the bathroom to puke. We both got zero sleep. I did the best I could to comfort her, but it was 1 am in the morning and there was not much I could do. It had to run its course.
The next morning, she was a wreck. At around 7 am, I went around town trying to find aspirin or medicine for Kayra but none of the stores were open that early. I went to the plan B restaurant and I got coffee and I bought some Tylenol off the owner. The Tylenol helped Kayra a little and but she was still very hungover and sick.
I had one day left in Sosua, and what started off as a good trip had gone downhill fast. Kayra somehow pulled herself together and decided she would cook for me and her daughters. I gave her $1000 pesos for some food. We went to back to her place and picked up chicken, spices, cooking oil, herbs, and vegetables at a local store. Kayra, and one of her daughters cooked a great meal. It thought well maybe things will work out all right.
I was wrong. Kayra stayed overnight at my place. Yes, we did have sex, but it was awkward at this point since she was still recovering from being sick that previous night. The magic was gone in a way. The next morning things were awkward.
Earlier in the month I asked, Kayra, if she would be available to spend time with me and show me around. She said sure. She said she could take time off work. She told me her job paid her $2500 pesos or $50.00 USD per week. While I was getting ready to check out of the condo and I gave 2500 pesos for the time she spent with me. I said it was a gift for her. Oh, she said I did not understand and that she needed more. Her boss was not paying her for the time she took off and would they would fine her for her time off. Okay, so I have her another 2500 pesos basically the rest of the cash I had. She still complained and said it was not enough and that she had bills to pay. Well, that was the end for me. I was exhausted, and I did not want to argue with her. I had to get myself ready for the trip back to Santo Domingo.
The trip was a bit of a nightmare, I had decided to take the 12 pm bus back to Santo Domingo so I could spend time as much as possible with, Kayra. Unlike the express bus this bus made every possible stop on the way to Santo Domingo to pick up more passengers. What could have been a three-hour trip became a 5 hour plus slog back to the city. Also, the bathroom was totally out of toilet paper making for an inconvenient restroom stop on the way. At the edge of Santo Domingo the bus came into rush hour traffic and it was bumper to bumper traffic into the city. I got back into Santo Domingo around 7 pm. For reason I had the bright idea of walking from the bus station to the hotel I had booked in the Malecon district. took me about an hour to get there. I was beat at this point.
I wanted to see Elizabeth, again and I thought I would be in the city by 3 pm. She and I had kept in touch while I was in Sosua, and she said he wanted to see me again. I was just too wiped out to meet up with her.
I also kept in touch with the tour guide that showed me around Santo Domingo. He wanted to catch up with me and find out what happened during my trip to Sosua. I gave him a call and he showed up a half hour later. We decide to walk down to the waterfront to the Tropical restaurant. The view was amazing and, it was nice to see the waves crashing against the beach.
Over dinner I gave him all the details of my experience with, Kayra. It was my first chance to talk with someone about the strange experience I had with her. He laughed about how she got wrecked during our second night together. I had no real insights to share about all this. He had been to Sosua and knew all about the scene there. He had warned about what to expect before I went there.
I realized I learned a lot during my time in the DR and from experience with the Dominican Cupid site. Kayra, Indira, and Mayriela had very thin profiles on the site. That was a red flag. It showed they were only putting in just enough information to have a profile on the site and meet men.
The second thing I learned was that the site unfortunately was a playground for scammers. It was easy for women to setup up a profile and dupe someone into sending them money. The site warned users about potential scams but there was no policing by site administrators of users. It was an open field for scammers.
Third, Dominican Cupid, Tagged, and Badoo and other dating apps are great services for prostitutes. They are better and more convenient than Backpages or Craiglist. The apps provide in the moment contact with a client and are free to use. They are great tools for “Freelancers” or prostitutes, who do not work in a brothel. The only problem is possible confusion between users. Not all women on any of these sites are prostitutes nor are all the men on the sites “Johns”.
My experience with, Elizabeth was an example. I had to feel my way through the situation. A situation that could have been a potential minefield. She came on strong and was very passionate with me when we met, but for me to assume she was a prostitute in those first few moments we met could have set off a firestorm. Fortunately, my instincts were correct.
Fourth, I knew that I had no way of telling the difference between a prostitute and a regular woman. I had no way of knowing if a woman I met in the DR was moonlighting as prostitute on the side. What I came to realize is that what difference did it make? It only made a difference to me if I was looking for a girlfriend or a wife. I knew I was not ready for a long-term relationship. As an older foreign man in the DR most women would look at me as a financial opportunity.
I admit I went on looks alone when I contacted women on Dominican Cupid. I had to be more discriminating when looking for a potential partner on the site. It was best for me to find a woman that had a well detailed profile, and one that had a career, education and employment. It was an interesting journey for me into a place and culture I had never experienced before. I had come away with a lot of experiences to talk about and to reflect on. I knew I would be back. Maybe it was because the women are beautiful, the culture is exotic and interesting. I had no idea what to expect next. With all that in mind I booked a trip went back to the DR a month later. Maybe my relationship with, Kayra, was the real thing and had potential?