Do you need this for your butt? Do you have a question about how much t.p. you can use in a wipe session?
LET'S TALK ABOUT THAT
Some people say there are no limits on length. But just like nobody can lick their own elbow, nobody should ever use too much toilet paper!
INSTRUCTIONS
First you must GRAB the toilet paper. Some say you should firmly clasp it, but GRABbing should be fine in this tutuorial.
NO, not your muscles! The T.P.! STRETCH the roll at an arms length and there you have your PERSONAL MAXIMUM LENGTH for usage. NEVER use more than your limit you despicable dog!
The LOGIC behind this RULE lies in the length of the natures pocket and one's own natural wing span. As you age your butt cracks length should increase at a rate that is acceptable when compared to your growing wing span.
Lastly we have the WIPING phase. This is a delicate procedure many say is even more difficult than perfoming surgery on a grape. So proceed CAUTIOUSLY. Make a SWIPING motion like you're taking money from a cashier. Don't be too quick though because we wouldn't want any flinging action.
Now throw your poo paper in the toilet and push the handle/button to finish. You are now educated on the usage of toilet paper.
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