It has been 2 years since I have become a mother. It was a roller coaster year of my life but it was the happiest. Sometimes, I feel envious of those people who have been successful in their life and career while I am at home. But every time I look at my son all of those feelings would go away. And if I will have a choice, I guess I would still chose this path over and over again. I could never the happiness I felt when every time I am with my son. I know I am not a perfect mother, at least I always try to be but I know that there are times that my patience are tested and I sometimes chose to lose it. I guess it is because how stressed I am with life right now.
Today, I have heard from five people that I am so fat. That they almost did not knew it was me because I have changed. I used to be so conscious of my look when I was young but now, I don't know. I seem to lose interest in myself. I rarely even look in the mirror. After realizing how much I have changed and how much I forgot to take care of myself and lose my self-confidence, I decided to start getting back my old self. I am not doing this for me but for my son too. I need him to see that his mom is confident, beautiful and most especially healthy.
I am so grateful that I have accomplished self-discipline today. It was hard than I expected it to be but I managed and I feel proud and happier. I have exercised, that was the hardest part but it made me feel more motivated, productive and of course, happy.