There's been this point i didn't know was active in me. That point being, "Seeking Approval". I noticed this point in regards to a specific individual....but in looking closer...I see i've allowed this in the smallest of moments.
I forgive myself for acceptng and allowing myself to separate myself from myself and making another being my king where I now require their approval to settle my discomforts.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize and understand my discomfort in relatonship to this particular being. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the point of wanting to fix things...and smoooth things over.....But from a taint within me ...where it's like wanting to fix the experience of me as this hurt, sadness and sorrow.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing I've been holding onto an experience within myself of "not good enough"...."i've screwed up and excluded myself...and I want back in"
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing and allowing myself to disempower myself within relationships...Where I accept that I am not good enough and thus I need to try to make up for not being good enough.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how influenced my behavior has been in accordance to my emotion and feeling....where it's like I've been acting out in a way to aleviate my emotional discomfort.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing the difference between connecting with the emotional experience of myself....and my words...me here beyond the veil of my emotion or feeling. I realize the emotion and feeling must not be suppressed....but accounted for and processed...and that this is my responsibility and it's not about making it about anybody else.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize I've inferiorized and self-victimized myself within seeking approval and self-validation from others.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to move from the starting point of my emotions...where it's just like wanting the discomforts I am experiencing to go away.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to abuse myself within my emotions...where it's like I am punishing myself because I believe someone doesn't like me...and I believe i must do and say things to get this person to like me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for getting so caught up in seeking approval that I forgot about myself.....my self-worth....my real regard....my care...my nourishment.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having been so hard on myself throughout my life....not realizing and understanding how I've blamed others so extensively for my own misfortune, sadness and sorrow.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding how i've put myself through the ringer in holding onto an extensive amount of discomfort in myself....because I've never really 100% embraced and accepted myself here....I've always had a taint of sorts.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to forget that I learned this survival tactctic as a small child....that you need to depend on people...and that people only want to help you if they like you....so it's important to be liked.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for taking such offense and defense to being criticized and being told that there are things about me that are not good.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to experience myself as heart broken when and as I experienced myself as being told "i am not good enough". I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for not realizing and understanding I've been holding onto a suppression of my self-worth since like forever ago.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for having justified the whilrwinds of my emotions.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing mysellf for judging myself for having taken so long to realize how I've been acting out my emotional reactions in an attempt to make my emotional suppressions go away.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself for believing that my self-change involves me saying or doing anything to anyone other than myself. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to get caught up within the desperation character where I believe I just need to get so and so to see things my way...to understand me better....to validate me in some way so I can be at ease.
When and as I see myself going into a point of seeking approval, I stop and breathe....I realize I am my own approval...and that for me to interact and work well with others....it stems from my self-acceptance.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to validate myself to others...by sharing my accomplishments. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize why i've been doing this...that it's been because i've accepted myself as inferior...and never enough...and so this has been my attempt to fit in and be accepted....and prove that I am good enough. I realize the only person to prove myself to is myself.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to justify the experience of myself as inferior and never enough.
I commit myself to stop trying to prove myself to people.
When and as I am feeling the need to explain myself to someone - I stop and breathe, I look at why I am experiencing this need to explain myself - I forgive myself - i realize i do not require anyone's approval for my well being and self-worth. I realize there is value in explaining yourself - i realize that the best explanations are free from the rush of emotion. I commit myself to making sure my communication is grounded and that there is no rush in me to speak.
I commit myself to stop inferiozing myself.
I commit myself to stop seeking validation and approval from others.
I commit myself to accepting myself and taking the best care of myself. I commit myself to be gentle with myself within learning harsh lessons as how i've mistreated myself.