I was going through some old videos and deleting crap from my computer this morning when I found this video that I actually had gone all the way through the process of uploading to youtube, but then I can't remember if I actually ever shared it in a blog as I intended to. It's unlisted. It has zero views, so if I shared it, then no one actually watched it.
So I thought I'd do that. Share it. I am feeling rather vulnerable today, and so this video is appropriate, because I remember this day, I felt rather blue.. and incredibly vulnerable. So, it could pretty much just be the same me that is the me right now. Sometimes when I am not feeling the greatest, it helps me to share something personal about myself with strangers, or semi-strangers... people who don't really know me in real life. That's why I've given so much of my time to this random chain of blocks. It's an easy way to disappear simultaneously with sharing.
Anyway.. here in this video I was alone in the house and just felt very lonely, as one tends to feel when they're alone in a house. I also remember doing a video right before this one and crying in the middle of it, and deleting that one right away. Last summer was rather difficult for me, it was quite emotional. I turn to the internet to escape from reality, in case no one has noticed, it's kinda good for that. The internet works very well at distracting. Probably that's why Al Gore invented it. He was in need of being distracted.
I look really bad in this video .. no make up and had previously just been crying...so you'll just get over it. Close your eyes or something if you can't handle the view. It's what I do when I drive over bridges. I can assure you, It works. This applies pretty much to all scary things in life. To make scary things less scary, just close your eyes.
Have a great day.
BY THE WAY..
If you are not in , maybe you should be. Yes? Helpie is always looking for new members. I, MYSELF, am particularly interested in members who would be interested in popping into the discord chat room early in the mornings to chat with me, because that is when I'm most chatty, am having my most amounts of coffee, and need my most amount of motivation to get my damn self through the damned day. Lately there aren't many people who come to chat in helpie.. maybe there are 10 people who ever pop into the discord chat room anymore. I MISS PEOPLE.
Anyway... I am paintingangels(serena)#3668 in discord.. send me a note if you're interested in being CHATTY with me and the other members of helpie in ... and if you are a good decent person who isn't a selfish asshole. That's the main requirement we have for joining helpie. Don't be an asshole. Don't be a dick. Nobody likes either of those 2 things. They're gross.
Okay bye..
♥- Serena