Returning to “civilization” after time “away” is a lot to deal with for anyone.
Recently I took about 10 days exploring woodsy Mendocino County, or the occupied territory of many different tribes; now aggregated mostly in the Round Valley Reservation. This is comprised of what are now identified as the tribes of:
Yuki: (Likely the original peoples of the area)
Pit River
Pomo
Nomlacki
Concow
Wailacki
I am currently feeling a strange mixture of (re)charged and exhausted all at once. My intention was to take myself on a meditation retreat; essentially just wanted to find a place to be silent, cook myself khichdi (traditional yogic meal of rice and legume porridge), meditate and wander the woods. Wow, I was in store for some adventures! I had the pleasure of dealing with snow, eroded roads, rednecks shooting lots of guns, bears, sneaky poison oak and the stifling reality of patchworked land in National Forests, much of it sold off to private resorts and ranches. But I also met some new forest friends, cooked good food, enjoyed small and efficient campfires (saved my own biochar for my garden!), bathed in remote rivers, walked a lot, breathed a lot, meditated on the decolonization of ecological/mental/emotional healing.
What I came to determine from the somewhat rough lessons I was facing was a reminder to myself and others to plan ahead more conscientiously. I believe more than I ever have that so many of the problems this world faces is because we rush into things so quickly thinking that we, or more often “someone else” will be able to pick up the pieces later. I see this happening in all circles, including activist, earth-worker, social-justice worker ones as well.
This time, I knew I was answering a type of a call, and needed forest time to be human, and admittedly was coming with entitlement of how to do that.
As I experienced a lot of setbacks and feelings of ill-preparedness; something kept telling me to slow down and return to a sense of self service; not self judgement. Even if that meant self-as-environment. During my trip I tried to make sure I cleaned up the sites where I camped, I broke down the fire rings, I spread leaves and pine needles over the areas my tent was. But I know, after this weekend, more Ponderosa Pine and Scrub/Alpine Oak and Douglas Fir will be target practice (and all the bullet shells will be back on the ground); elk, brown bear, osprey, ravens, blue jays, woodpeckers, other aves I just don’t know, grey squirrels and mountain lions will all be stressed out by all the loud gas spewing machinery traipsing around their land.
I know all of our emotional gunk stays inside us unless we work through it, and use it to intervene, turning self-love into public justice.
I know that as European churches burn, so have Indigenous Sacred Lands been actively and constantly desecrated. That Indigenous European churches used to be the woods. That Oak groves of Celtic legend were the gathering sites of queer magic then . . . . and now . . . and some of my ancestors may have spoken the sacred tongues of Ogham, the Druidic language of Trees.
Please read the rest of this article on my permaculture site: (and forgive that some of that site is dated and I'm making time to update soon!)
https://emergentearthworks.wordpress.com/
And please let me know what you think! Apologies for any slowness in replying; I'm juggling a big life transition as I look for housing and expand the work I'm doing again. We all move in cycles do we not?
Many blessings, in mutual solidarity, solitude and sanctuary,
Truly yours,
Nori Flora
