at this distance from town – who on earth can want me!’
‘Gentleman in the coffee room, sir,’ replied the Boots, as Mr Winkle opened the door, and confronted him; ‘gentleman says he’ll not detain you a moment, sir, but he can take no denial.’
‘Very odd!’ said Mr Winkle; ‘I’ll be down directly.’
He hurriedly wrapped himself in a travelling-shawl, and dressing-gown, and proceeded down stairs. An old woman and a couple of waiters were cleaning the coffee room, and an officer in undress uniform was looking out of the window. He turned round as Mr Winkle entered, and made a stiff inclination of the head. Having ordered the attendants to retire, and closed the door very carefully, he said, ‘Mr Winkle, I presume?’
‘My name isWinkle, sir.’
‘You will not be surprised, sir, when I inform you, that I have called here this morning on behalf of my friend, Dr Slammer, of the Ninety-seventh.’
‘Doctor Slammer!’ said Mr Winkle.
‘Doctor Slammer. He begged me to express his opinion that your conduct of last evening was of a description which no gentleman could endure: and (he added) which no one gentleman would pursue towards another.’
Mr Winkle’s astonishment was too real, and too evident, to escape the observation of Doctor Slammer’s friend; he therefore proceeded. – ‘My friend, Doctor Slammer, requested me to add, that he is firmly persuaded you were intoxicated during a portion of the evening, and possibly unconscious of the extent of the insult you were guilty of. He commissioned me to say, that should this be pleaded as an excuse for your behaviour, he will consent to accept a written apology, to be penned by you, from my dictation.’
‘A written apology!’ repeated Mr Winkle, in the most emphatic tone of amazement possible.
‘Of course you know the alternative,’ replied the visiter, coolly.
‘Were you entrusted with this message to me, by name?’ inquired Mr Winkle, whose intellects were hopelessly confused by this extraordinary conversation.
‘I was not present myself,’ replied the visiter, ‘and in consequence of your firm refusal to give your card to Doctor Slammer, I was desired by that gentleman to identify the wearer of a very uncommon coat – a bright blue dress coat, with a gilt button, displaying a bust, and the letters “P. C.” ’.
Mr Winkle actually staggered with astonishment, as he heard his own costume thus minutely described. Doctor Slammer’s friend proceeded: –
‘From the inquiries I made at the bar, just now, I was convinced that the owner of the coat in question arrived here, with three gentlemen, yesterday afternoon. I immediately sent up to the gentleman who was described as appearing the head of the party; and he, at once, referred me to you.’
If the principal tower of Rochester Castle had suddenly walked from its foundation, and stationed itself opposite the coffee-room window, Mr Winkle’s surprise would have been as nothing, compared with the profound astonishment with which he had heard this address. His first impression was, that his coat had been stolen. ‘Will you allow me to detain you one moment?’ said he.
‘Certainly,’ replied the unwelcome visiter.
Mr Winkle ran hastily up-stairs, and with a trembling hand opened the bag. There was the coat in its usual place, but exhibiting, on a close inspection, evident tokens of having been worn on the preceding night.
‘It must be so,’ said Mr Winkle, letting the coat fall from his hands. ‘I took too much wine after dinner, and have a very vague recollection of walking about the streets, and smoking a cigar, afterwards. The fact is, I was very drunk; – I must have changed my coat – gone somewhere – and insulted somebody – I have no doubt of it; and this message is the terrible consequence.’ Saying which, Mr Winkle retraced his steps in the direction of the coffee-room, with the gloomy and dreadful resolve of accepting the challenge of the warlike Doctor Slammer, and abiding by the worst consequences that might ensue.
To this determination Mr Winkle was urged by a variety of considerations; the first of which was, his reputation with the club. He had always been looked up to as a high authority on all matters of amusement and dexterity, whether offensive, defensive, or inoffensive; and if, on this very first occasion of being put to the test, he shrunk back from the trial, beneath his leader’s eye, his name and standing were lost for ever.