Money in the Bank is ready for it’s Big Five moment, but will it succeed?
By Marc Normandin@Marc_Normandin Updated Jun 17, 2018, 11:20pm EDT
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Money in the Bank is over, and we even already saw one briefcase successfully cashed in. Shinsuke Nakamura threw hands at AJ Styles’ crotch, but was it enough to win the WWE Championship? How did Carmella do against Asuka, or Ronda Rousey against Nia Jax? Did Bobby Lashley defeat Sami Zayn and avenge the troops, or whatever?
Yeah, I know, I don’t care about the last one, either. But the answers to all the things we do care about are here, in the live blog we wrote during WWE Money in the Bank 2018. If you want to read it in the order it happened in, scroll down to the bottom and work your way back up match-by-match, and get the full blow-by-blow of one of WWE’s biggest pay-per-view events.
Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder match
Here we go: the main event. It’s Bobby Roode vs. Miz vs. Rusev vs. Samoa Joe vs. Kevin Owens vs. Braun Strowman vs. Finn Balor vs. whichever member of the New Day is in the match, all vying to become Mr. Money in the Bank. And for the right to be the only one holding a briefcase until this time next year, since Alexa just cashed her case in on Nia Jax already.
Kofi Kingston is the New Day member in the ladder match, and I’ve changed my mind, he should win this match.
Thank you, men in the Money in the Bank match, for playing out the scene from my preview published earlier this morning:
Miz got stopped, because Samoa Joe noticed he was doing it, but still.
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Kevin Owens climbed up a ladder to splash Strowman, but Strowman got up... and climbed the ladder, carried Owens back to the top, and threw him down to a table below. That was at least a 20-foot ladder, right? Jesus.
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Strowman just snapped a ladder in half by running through it, despite Bobby Roode and Finn Balor holding it. Miz’s reaction was to look like he saw a ghost and also the ghost was making out with his mother.
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Rusev is currently applying the Accolade to both Bobby Roode and Kofi Kingston, and now he’s stacked Miz on that pile to try doing it to all three of them. A Triple Accolade, briefly, before Samoa Joe stopped it with a Coquina Clutch.
Strowman is climbing up the ladder with Kofi riding him, hoping he can jump up and over and nope, he fell backwards.
Oh shit, Braun won! Huge surprise there — I was convinced they’d have everyone else stop him, but the push is real. Good for him. Good for us! Bad for Brock Lesnar.
Ronda Rousey vs. Nia Jax (c) for the RAW Women’s Championship
I was pretty sure Rousey vs. Jax for the RAW Women’s title was going to main event, but it looks like the men’s Money in the Bank ladder match will be the one in that slot. There wasn’t really a wrong answer there, at least, especially since this is the last one-on-one matchup of the night.
Nia reminds Ronda that Rousey might be Rousey, but Nia is the strongest woman she’s ever stared down in any ring. She kicks things off by lifting up Rousey and throwing her once, then again across the ring. Rousey tries to stop it with a flurry of fists, but Jax shoved Ronda across the ring again.
Rousey keeps trying to apply different submissions, but can’t really lock a full one in, and Nia is trying to lift her up to get out of it. Sit-out powerbomb — Stephanie McMahon wasn’t pulling that shit on Rousey, that’s for sure.
Military press! Again, Rousey has never faced anyone like this before, and it’s showing. Rousey is now going for the guillotine choke, favored by other women like Bayley when facing Nia, but guess what: Jax knows that shit is coming in every match now, and she’s making Ronda pay for her lack of innovation by slamming her head into the ground, repeatedly.
Ronda’s starting to show some life again, but Jax kicks out with authority on a pin attempt. That’s okay, because Rousey decided to kick Nia with authority in the face. She followed with a judo throw of Jax — super impressive! — but Nia still kicked out.
It’s gotta be arm bar or nothing here for Rousey, most likely. Nia can take a whole lot of punishment.
Turns out it’s nothing! Alexa Bliss is here with the Money in the Bank briefcase, and she’s beating Ronda Rousey down with it! She also hit Nia Jax, so... is she going to cash in? Nope, she’s here to beat Rousey down.
Bliss can’t decide if she’s going to cash in because she keeps hitting Nia with the case, but now she’s doing it! Here’s a Twisted Bliss, and Alexa is RAW Women’s Champion once again!
Well, that took considerably less time than it did for Carmella to cash in last year’s briefcase.
Shinsuke Nakamura vs. AJ Styles (c) in a Last Man Standing match for the WWE Championship
How many times is Shinsuke Nakamura going to hit Styles in the dick during this match? It’s been like two minutes, and it hasn’t happened yet.
They’ve moved the action to the outside of the ring, which is a good reminder of the rules for a Last Man Standing match. The match can finish anywhere, and there are no pinfalls or submissions: it’s simply beating your opponent so hard with whatever you want — fists, hands, chairs, ladders, chainsaws(?) — until they can’t get up before the ref counts to 10.
WE ALMOST GOT THE FIRST ONE, BUT NAK MISSED
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His WWE run has been a mixed bag but goddamn Nakamura’s character work is so good, all the time.
Nakamura sets Styles up on the announce table and lands a Kinshasa, and gets a count of nine out of it before Styles rolls off the table. While he recovers in the ring, Nak goes under it and pulls out a folding table.
This is easily the best of the matches they’ve had against each other during this feud. There’s intensity, when things are slow it’s because Nakamura is being a jerk, and not because the two are meandering, and we’re all sitting here waiting for the first actual shot to the groin.
Styles gets thrown through the table in the corner, and Nakamura stands and laughs while waiting for his 10 count... but Styles got up at nine, again! He’s leaning on the ropes, so things are not going great for him, but he hasn’t lost yet.
Styles has started to take control, and Nakamura is begging him for mercy. Styles didn’t buy it, but he got too close for a chair shot, and Nakamura finally caught him with a low blow.
Nakamura got Styles down for a count of nine on that, and reacted with a Kinshasa that has Styles down once again. Another nine count, but he’s up once more!
Styles’ everything hurts, but he’s wrecked Nakamura’s knee, and it’s keeping things here even. Styles Clash off the stairs onto the floor! STYLES JUST KICKED NAKAMURA AS HARD AS HE COULD IN THE GROIN-AL AREA, THEN HIT A PHENOMENAL FOREARM FROM THE RING TO THE ANNOUNCE TABLE
Nakamura can’t get up from that, not even before a 10 count, and AJ Styles retains! That’s a huge surprise — what’s next for Nakamura, if not winning the WWE Championship here? That’s not a judgment question, just... a question.
Asuka vs. Carmella (c) for the SmackDown Women’s Championship
Okay so, Asuka should straight-up murder Carmella with like, one solid kick to the face. However, that obviousness just means there are going to be shenanigans to keep Carmella from dying. That, or Asuka is going to kill her. It could go either way.
Wow it turns out I still love Asuka and everything about her. Carmella is a great character, by the way: my only real issue with her defeating Charlotte at the last pay-per-view is that there weren’t enough shenanigans. They could make up for it tonight against Asuka!
Carmella screamed that she’s not scared of Asuka, and Asuka is now intent on making Carmella afraid. It might be working, but it’s hard to tell, because Carmella doesn’t look like she knows where she is right now.
Carmella tried to leave the match with her title, and Asuka slid a knee into her face, so we’re back on. Oh, Carmella managed to slam Asuka’s face into the ring post, so now she’s in control, at least briefly.
Asuka and Carmella are trading blows, and the only reason Carmella isn’t down and out is because she managed to duck the worst of them and answer with a kick to the head.
Asuka caught a Carmella kick before it could land, and then turned it into a knee submission, because she’s the best. Carmella makes the mistake everyone eventually makes against Asuka: taunting her and not realizing it’s going to get you kicked in the face.
I do have to say, though, that Carmella is controlling this match just a bit too often: did someone forget she’s a cowardly heel?
So uh, Asuka’s robe and mask are standing on the apron, staring at Asuka. Carmella tried to roll her up, but it didn’t work — James Ellsworth is here! Aaaand Carmella kicks Asuka in the face during the Ellsworth reveal, and Carmella gets the victory.
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The mask/robe thing was a nice touch, considering everyone assumed Ellsworth was making an appearance to cause an Asuka defeat. Plus, we can safely assume Asuka is going to win this feud in the end, and do so after wiping Ellsworth off the face of the Earth.
Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal
Roman Reigns isn’t in a title match: yay. Jinder Mahal isn’t in a title match: yay. They are facing each other at Money in the Bank: y...yay? That remains to be seen, but Roman hits hard, and it might finally get Jinder to start hitting real hard, too, which he definitely should do because he is a 6-foot-5, 240-pound muscle.
The real question is whether Chicago is about to boo Jinder or cheer him against Roman. I’m desperate to find the answer to this question.
You will be shocked but Reigns is being booed during his entrance. And the CM Punk chants began about a minute into the actual match. They need to just go all-out for like 5-7 minutes, beat the hell out of each other, and finish. I’m not saying to rush: I’m saying you can do a lot of good in 5-7 minutes of hurried wrestling.
And now “boring” chants have started, because they aren’t going at full-speed. Boring chants are terrible, by the way, but also, you need to know your audience sometimes!
Sunil Singh came out on a wheelchair, but weird, he was healthy enough to push Roman Reigns into the ring post on the outside of the ring when neither he nor the ref were watching.
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Now the crowd is chanting “Rusev Day,” which I am unable to be unhappy about in any circumstance.
I will say, though, that this is a cool down match for a hot ladder match, that is not for a title, nor is it for any future right to challenge for a title. All of y’all chanting weird shit at Roman to prove a point or whatever are straight-up crybabies.
At the same time, why are you doing chinlocks I said 5-7 minutes PICK UP THE PACE, BOYS.
Why isn’t anyone in the ring listening to my live blog advice
Roman finally takes out Sunil Singh with a Superman Punch and a spear, and then Mahal, without any help left to him, goes down 1-2-3 to a pin. Roman wins, the crowd was a mix of ironic cheers and actual cheers, and now we can all move on.
Women’s Money in the Bank ladder match
It’s Becky Lynch vs. Naomi vs. Natalya vs. Charlotte vs. Ember Moon vs. Sasha Banks vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Lana, in a ladder match, where the winner gets a briefcase with a guaranteed contract that allows them to challenge the RAW or SmackDown Women’s Champion. Everyone in this match has been a WWE Women’s champ at least once besides Ember Moon and Lana, and Ember is a former NXT Women’s Champion, so she’s not without gold.
Charlotte’s robe is worthy of winning:
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They are going all-out to start, which is a great change from last year’s inaugural women’s Money in the Bank match — it was a little timid, and that carried through. Not so here, though! We’ve already got lots of faces to ladders and big kicks and flips and oh man Sasha just got crossbodied into a ladder by Ember Moon, this match rules.
Charlotte and Becky are arguing about which one of them should put the ladder down first. Really, they should just use it to hit Natalya. Naomi agrees, because she jumped on the ladder and launched herself at Nattie.
hey how’s the match going, Marc?
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Becky is the first one to really get up the ladder, but the ladder is then pushed away by like, everyone else. This is why you don’t climb early! Everyone’s limbs still work!
Ember Moon has been the star of this so far, but Sasha Banks is doing the Sasha thing — here she’s staring down Charlotte, and now they’re racing up the ladder, only to knock each other off of it. For the record, every wrestler is now on the ground.
Charlotte went for a Crucifix Powerbomb of Sasha into a ladder setup in the corner, but she walked back too far and Sasha hopped off onto the ladder. She nearly got up there, since Natalya grabbed Charlotte, but Becky threw her off and then climbed up the rest of the way herself. She’s down, too, with Alexa Bliss climbing — Sasha is up again! EVERYTHING IS HAPPENING AT ONCE SASHA AND ALEXA ARE UP TOP WITH BECKY DOWN BELOW PUNCHES EVERYWHERE oh god Sasha might be too short to get the briefcase from the top rung of the regular ladder.
Lana has the enormous ladder out now, and she’s climbing it, but so is Sasha! Six women on two ladders! Oh man, there aren’t six anymore, because Natalya grabbed Sasha and powerbombed her into the ladder, knocking it over along with Becky. I CAN’T FEEL MY FACE
Uh did Alexa Bliss just Yoshi Tonic Charlotte, holy shit
NAOMI JUST JUMPED ON THE LADDER FROM ANOTHER LADDER THAT WAS NOT UPRIGHT but she couldn’t get the briefcase down — she was too far away to have the leverage. Becky and Charlotte started fighting for it up top, but then Alexa turned the ladder over. Again, this match RULES.
I appreciate Natalya keeps wrestling in a way that is like “I’m not ready to win yet, but neither are you.”
Charlotte went under the ladder to deliver a spear to Ember Moon, which, Charlotte, that’s bad luck, what are you doing
Becky hits Charlotte with the Becksploder suplex, and nearly gets the briefcase, but she was one rung too low — Alexa Bliss knocks her off, and she pulls down the briefcase — Alexa is now not only one of the lone women to ever win both the RAW and SmackDown Women’s Championships, but she’s also a Money in the Bank winner.
Elias vs. Seth Rollins (c) for the Intercontinental Championship
It’s the best wrestler going in WWE right now against Elias, who is definitely the company’s best guitar player/scarf-wearer. Can he take Rollins out and win his IC strap, though? That’s the question before us in Chicago.
Elias is so good. He’s got Chicago’s crowd eating out of the palm of his hand, and then he calls them all garbage and refuses to play a song for them because they’re “not worth it.” The crowd was already going to be pro-Rollins, but that ensures it.
Rollins is moving a little slow here, as he seems to be scoping out Elias and what he’s capable of. I’d guess the pace picks up as Rollins gets comfortable uh whoops never mind Elias just shocked Rollins with a huge clothesline that dropped him outside the ring. Elias is in control now.
We’ve got some blood here, as Rollins is bleeding from his mouth. It’s not clear what made it happen, but imo it was during one of Rollins’ aggressive bumps to the floor!
Speaking of, Rollins just executed a suicide dive to Elias on the outside, but he seems to have gotten as much damage from it as his target. He’s still in control, though, landing a Blockbuster off the turnbuckle when he got back inside the ring.
Rollins tweaked his knee jumping into the ring, and Elias immediately tries to capitalize. Rollins might be in trouble here, as he’s fighting both neck pain from Elias’ attacks leading up to this match, as well as the constant knee problems that come with a surgically repaired knee. One wonders if the injured knee will play into the finish, considering he’s using the stomp again.
lol of course, Rollins climbs the turnbuckle to try another flying attack, and goes for the frog splash, only for Elias to throw his knees up to counter. Rollins kicks out, but now he’s got a bad neck and a bad leg and ribs in pain.
Well he powered through the pain, hopping up to the top rope to superplex Elias, and then he rolled it into a Falcon Arrow — no pin, and now Rollins is hurting even more, but so is Elias.
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Rollins sets up for the stomp, but Elias rolled out of the ring! Rollins tries to hit him with another suicide dive, but Elias moves out of the way, and then throws Rollins into the turnbuckle! A big elbow off the top rope, and... Rollins kicks out! What a sequence.
Rollins tries for a buckle bomb, but his knee gave out — they’re now throwing pin counters back and forth and back and forth aaaaand Rollins gets the pin! He had a handful of tights, and you know Elias will point that out for a rematch down the line, but for now, Seth retains the Intercontinental Championship.
Bobby Lashley vs. Sami Zayn
I have to tell you: this Zayn/Lashley feud has been so bad that I don’t care about a Sami Zayn match for the first time in my life. How dare you, Bobby Lashley, and how dare you, WWE writers. Writing scripts Zayn can’t spin into gold was supposed to be some philosophical question we’d never find an answer to, like can God create a rock so heavy that even Braun Strowman couldn’t lift it. And yet, here we are.
The good news is that Money in the Bank has the two matches with less-than-stellar builds leading off the show, and the rest should be pretty solid from here on out. Well, your mileage may vary with Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal, but I’m optimistic.
Lashley is beating Zayn pretty handily in between commentary talking about how Sami disrespected the troops. Mostly with stalling vertical suplexes. There’s a third vertical suplex and he got the three count and wooo we’ve escaped and we’re still alive with things to look forward to!
Oh, before we move on to those things, here’s a reminder of a horrible thought I had back in early April
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Oh look, the first thing happened, and Lesnar isn’t booked for this show or the next one. Sorry, now it’s in your brain, too.
Kevin Owens brought the New Day pancakes
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Kevin Owens brought a peace offering of pancakes and Canadian maple syrup to New Day to try to get them to take out Braun Strowman before the match, but he made the mistake of not joining them in the pancake feast, and even telling them he wasn’t a fan of breakfast foods in general. New Day took the pancakes, but kicked Kevin out, and how could they not? I love toast, Owens, but there’s more to breakfast than toast.
Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass
Well this is a surprise of an opener on an evening with four title matches and two Money in the Bank ladder matches! Daniel Bryan has beat the heck out of Cass again and again, but Cass keeps acting like it never happened and saying Bryan hasn’t faced anyone like him before. Will Bryan win again? Let’s hope so, because A) it’s Daniel Bryan, B) it’s Cass and C) you do not start a show in supersmark city, Chicago, with Daniel Bryan losing to Big F’n Cass. Or, rather, you should not.
Bryan immediately goes for drop toe holds to take the big man down and work on that surgically repaired knee, but Cass eventually gets out of it and then throws Bryan face-first to the outside barricade. That’ll slow the pace down.
WWE not fixing this part of Cass’ entrance remains the best part of his matches. That’s not even a criticism of his ring work, it’s just that funny.
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Cass is going with the rest holds, but Bryan is elbowing his way out of them. Cass is still in control, though, kneeing Bryan in the chest, and then getting a two count after a slam.
Bryan gets another drop toe hold, this one sending Cass face-first into the turnbuckle, and Bryan has an opening for some hard-ass kicks. Those are different from hard ass kicks, though, one did get Cass solid in the ole glutes. Bryan is focusing on that surgically repaired knee, now, and that’s going to be his best chance: keeping the big man grounded and without his leg strength.
Cass tried to pull another Sidewalk Slam out, and Bryan somehow countered it with his submission finisher, the Yes Lock — Cass escaped by grabbing the ropes, but he might not be so lucky next time.
Thank you Corey Graves for covering for the fact that the Torture Rack Cass applied was... not great. That’s what you need an announcer to do, make it play into the story of the match instead of letting the crowd go, “Cass, man, what are you doing?”
Cass gives it his best with a huge boot to the face, but he still can’t get Bryan to stay down for the three count. He’s getting visibly frustrated — is a mistake coming, or is he going to ramp up the abuse?
Bryan with the Running Knee! He got high enough on Cass to knock him down! Then Bryan flipped him over, threw on a submission on the knee he had worked on the entire match, and Cass had no choice but to tap. Bryan wins to open Money in the Bank, and Chicago remains satisfied.
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