Yesterday, my brother and friend Bobby Bassey after a much talked about n well attended Traditional Marriage at Etinan on Friday shocked the Uyo's Facebook community with a simple "cost less" white wedding in the office of Rev Uma Ukpai in Uyo.
To be honest I didn't see it coming and many of us who attended the TM didn't also saw it coming. Yesterday someone asked, "when is Bobby's church wedding" I didn't know and I told him so, only to come on Facebook and saw pictures. I was amazed. "Wow" I screamed.
I have seen posts and comments from many friends males and females with regards to the said "Cheap wedding" style of the couple and I am personally not surprised it turned out that way. A lot of them applauded the couple for their style, some even said "my dream wedding". For the men, I pity those who are dreaming of having such a cheap wedding, it's not totally for u to decide. Just pray you meet the kind of woman who reasons your ways and sees no reason why you should seek to impress the world and return to start up your marital journey broke and bankrupted. Even if you are rich, you can still choose the silence style, some people don't just like noise. #wink. But before you pick any, let madam be in agreement wit it mbok.
You and I know that marriage usually has it beautiful fanfare, unique decorations, the extraordinary fashion display (by friends and family especially the Uyo Facebook Community), the special treatment etc but you will also appreciate the level of cost, expenses and stress they avoided by keeping it that at the low key level..
The cost of hall rentals, decorations, clothes for bridal trains, car hire(stress of begging car owners, fuel etc) cost of feeding the whole of Uyo for that day, and the planned and unplanned logistics expenses among others. Beyond these basic factors, you also need able hands to plan and manage the day else you will have it all ruined, the stress of any disappointment by a caterer, decorators, driver, photographers, or church were avoided. Financially, my brother saved nothing less than a million naira or more just by having a woman who understood that all these are mere "fantasies" and it's not a factor that makes for a successful n happy marriage. Not that they couldn't afford it as others do, in their thinking, they just don't need it that usual way. (My thinking)
Now this is not about Bobby the Groom, it's much more of the wife who owes the day, it's her day and the choice is hers to a very large extent. How many of our ladies will accept to have her "Big Day" cheapens so low? Its all about choice, understanding of reality and acceptance by both parties. I really respect her for this. She is a great woman and I'm not surprised at all.
People placed different priorities in life. Some their greatest days ever should be their wedding day, others it's something else. But some entrepreneurial minded folks like me will find this style of wedding very economical and desirable. They are many tangible investments to be done and life to live after wedding, why waste it all and still owe for a one day event?
Mind you, keeping it low doesn't mean one is poor, even the rich hardly show off, its the poor that employs all means possible just to impress other. At the end of the day "who really cares?". If this style suits you, pls go for it, stop waiting for million naira to come. But ensure Madam accepts it. Its her day, let her make her choice or make her see reasons with you. She should be happy on her Big Day, whether it's big or lowkey. Once she is kul and comfortable, pls go ahead, you will be saving yourself untold stress at the end of the day.
Believe me, my brother went home with his bride happy and slept without fears of how to settle debt. Even if they are any, not as huge as some people incurs after their beautiful weddings. Me I don't like stress and I hate to owe, Dear Future wife, take note....
We may use this style, but if you no gree, keep your money ooooo. 😂
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