Sometimes for me, trying to focus on one thing, to concentrate so
That I can exclude outside thoughts and distractions,
is like trying to tether a storm cloud.
“Tethered Storm”
by
Jerry E Smith
©9/13/2014
I've just done something I haven't done in years.
I had my alarm set for 6 (normal for me)
The alarm went off, I looked at the clock, wondered why I had set it to
wake me so early, got up to pee, realized I still had my dentures in...😠
Finishing up, I turned back to my bedroom, but noticed the light
coming from the living room. I went to the fridge, and saw the light was
dimly coming from outside. (darn, it's that light this early already? 😠 )
I decided to go ahead and get up, I went and took all my morning meds,
came in got my leftover coffee and while it was heating,
prepared a new pot and started it brewing.
Then I came over to the computer, and discovered I hadn't shut it off!! 😠
Turned on the TV, 6 ¿AM? news ( ? ) was on, I made a post about an xfinity
email THIS MORNING and FINALLY, the light went on.
I opened my phone alarm and checked; it had been set for
SIX PM, not AM,
so now I'm sitting here with a cup of hot coffee,
instead of egg on my plate I have it on my face.
NOTE!
The following writing is from 2016, depicting EVENTS from then but
The feelings still apply today just as much if not more
Today is Tuesday, I find I am a morass of conflicting emotions.
I’ve had some news, that was on one front surprising and
Both uplifting and confusing.
On the other front, the second bit of news was also surprising
And both Depressing and confusing.
After six years of struggling, do I accept what I got and be
Happy?
Or do I ‘disagree and appeal’ meaning even more years of my
Life spent in struggle with “THE SYSTEM”.
I have barely turned on my computer today. I got up for a
While, then went back to bed, and I am tempted to go back
There once more.
I have some friends who want me to come out tonight, to
Share in the frivolity, but will I just be a wet blanket?
OR
Will that help to ‘divert’ me out of this rut?
I hate depression.
I hate being paralyzed, in a rut not
Knowing what to do.
“Personal Log, Stardate 9.13.16”
by
Jerry E Smith
©9/13/16
