Over a period of 2yrs I lost 3 babies all at 12-14 weeks of pregnancy. While cleaning out a draw this morning I found this letter that I wrote my baby girl that I lost. I went for a walk and picked a flower on her due date and sat under a tree to write this letter.
Dear Annabelle
I wish today was the special day we would have met in person that your sweet smell of new would be tucked into my breast feeding with vigour. Oh how I miss you.
The pain I feel is so desolate so lost without reason or purpose. The loss of you hurts so much
There is no reason to ask why as there is simply no answer. It raises more and more questions without purpose or reason.
I am thankful you were mine if only for a short time. I am lost without you. But know you are safe secure and ready with the angels. I am pleased you are with God. That is a comfort.
Love Mummy xxoo
At the time of writing this letter to Annabelle we didn't know why I kept miscarrying. My miscarriages were later found to be related to my thyroid. I lost 2 boys and 1 girl. This still brings tears to my eyes.